Recently I cleared my cupboards, and came upon a 'relic'. Long before the internet age, I had penned down my writing in notebooks. There were a few of them; old, yellowed and the ink barely legible due to age. But I felt a sense of excitment; for in those pages were stories I wrote when I harboured a secret desire to be a writer someday. Hahaha...how things have changed.
But for those of who who enjoy writing, here is one entitled, "One Bad Apple".
She lost count how many times she had polished the fruit.
As a child, she had helped Grandma at the small market stall and knew that the customers would always be attracted to fruits that looked juicy and fresh. The red apple gleamed under the pale night sky, its frangrance redolent.
"Why do you line up your apples and pears this way, Nana? How come you put aside those?" Edwina heard her child-like voice asking Grandma years ago. Meticulously, Grandma would go through the baskets of produce each morning, checking every individual fruit.
A gentle, wrinkled face smiled back and patted her head rather absently.
"Win, these are the that we sell. You see those in the other basket?" Grandma's voice was soft, patient and soothing. She walked over slowly, and took up an apple, that to Edwina's eyes, no different from the rest. Grandma placed the it into the little girl's hands. The hands that covered hers were warm and comforting.
"Look carefully Win. What do you see? What do you smell? What can you feel?"
Edwina stared long and hard. The apple had a deep red skin, and a slight fruity yet tarty smell. It was round and firm...and yet at the bottom, was a tender, bruised spot, that was soft to the touch.
"It's different here, Nana." she chirped, happy at the sudden discovery. Otherwise, the fruit would have been perfect.
"That, my child, makes all the difference why I put it in this basket and not there. You see, this apple is spoilt. If I leave it together with the other apples, within a few days, all the other apples would go bad too. There is a Western saying,"One bad apple spoils the whole barrel."...So you be good ok Wina, and grow up and make me happy."
"Of course Grandma...I love you the best in the whole wide world." she promised as she skipped away to play.
...Grandma...
Her reverie was momentarily broken and Edwina shivered when a cold wind blew.
The water lapped gently below her knees.
"Oh Grandma...I miss you."
Fate dealt her a cruel blow, and Edwina's sole caregiver left quietly one night to meet her Creator. Edwina at 18, was left to fend for herself. A little too old to be made ward of the state, and a little too young to be financially independent, Edwina had no choice but to leave her sheltered existence behind. Not only did she lose her beloved Nana, she losely lost herself too.
She had to give up her hopes and dreams.
She had excelled in school, but could not afford to carry on.
She went out like a proverbial sacrificial lamb into the world of hungry predators...and a new Edwina emerged. She met a much older man named Lionel who promised her the earth, moon and the entire universe. He swept her off her feet, and for awhile, Edwina felt loved and safe again.
But she soon learnt the bitter truths about life.
She learnt the ugly side of human nature, and how promises can be empty. She saw how cruel fate can be, when Lionel, upon learning that she was pregnant, had discarded her like a broken, unwanted toy.
"Ms Edwina...I am sorry to inform you...that..you are HIV positive."
Momentarily her eyes flew open as she shuddered at the memory.
The doctor's voice was cold and distanced...as if he blamed her for the fate about to befall on her unborn child. Lionel had left her with two parting gifts...
By then, Edwina was oblivious to the cold.
She gently patted her rounded belly tenderly, and allowed herself to feel the slight butterfly-like moments of the life within her. "Poor little baby. You will be all right."
She again held up the apple against the starless sky.
She looked around for the tiny bruised spot.
"I am so sorry, Grandma. I failed you. I am your bad apple. But I will not spoil anyone else.
That...I will promise."
With that, she flung the fruit ahead in the water...and slowly allowed herself to be embraced by the cold, open sea.
