Happy New Year

Dear God,
I want to start 2010 with a prayer of thanks.
Thank you for all your blessings
- my happy family, my stable job, my growing 'special kids', my supportive friends
- good health and peace of heart, mind and soul.

I ask for Your forgiveness for all my transgressions...
- for my moments of folly and doubt
- for my carelessness and pride.

I ask for Your guidance
and fill my heart with Nur & Hikmah
so that all I do will be to seek You.

Help me be strong and steadfast
and that my worldy deeds will lead me to You.

Ameen...ameen...ameen.
Ya Rabbal a lameen.

Chek Jawa Adventures

I did promise that I would continue about Chek Jawa...

It was a day about discoveries,and re-discoveries.
I have already described the fun ride in the rain.  I think God had meant to let me enjoy that experience.  I mean, had it been hot that morning, perhaps I would have been toiling away uncomfortably as I pedalled along the road.

First exciting find was the rubber tree near the bicycle post.  We could not cycle around Chek Jawa itself...you need to hike and trek on foot.  We were concerned about the safety of the bikes, but the bicycle owner had assured us that it was not likely that the bicycles would be stolen.  Anyway, back to the rubber tree...complete with its carefully carved bark and a cup to collect the latex.

It was wonderful to have people to were eager to actually look at the plants and animals up close.  The rain had sent quite a number of creatures into hiding in shelters, but the cries were heard were authentic.  Even birds trilled the sounds of freedom.  Erico was trying to peer into airholes in the mud and sand in search of crabs and other forms of life...but there were only the baby mudskippers enjoying themselves,

Having Faz around was a blessing.  Having grown up in a kampung by the sea, she recognised most of the flora and fauna...and named them for us, including trivia like which are edible.  I was so tempted by the buah nibong (or attap chee) which were found in gorgeous red bunches. 

The highlight(!) was the spectacular watch tower...a wooden structure about 5 storeys high.  Now you know me and my problem with wooden planks...but add to my fear of heights...you get the picture.  Nothing ventured, nothing gained they say...But guess what happened when you have 2 old ladies who are equally frightened but gung-ho at the same time?

I think it was a good thing we were the only group who had braved the rain...cos the silence covering Chek Jawa area was suddenly punctured by hysterical laughter .  Poor Hafiz could not understand why his usually composed mum and her friend burst out in uncontrollable laughter as they slowly made their way up...the giggles mixed with incantations to God to help protect us.  That was how we conquered our fears...releasing stress hee-hee-haha-ing our way to the top.

Once up there, the view was breathtaking...I was winded by the effort and too much laughing...and fear can be paralysing...so I simply sat down, shaking each time the kids moved around.  But Faz and I did it...we made it to the top...But oppps...if you are up, you need to go down again...which was an even scarier experience.  We closed our eyes, and walked sideways like crabs...and praying like mad again.  Yea!

Poor Erico.
He so badly wanted to see part of the coralled areas.  But by then, the tide had come in, and the low sea bed was already covered with water.  I fell in love with the sea moss which the tides brought it.  It made certain areas look as if they are carpeted with lush green carpet.

By then, the rain stopped.
There was a light breeze and we walked along the broadwalk.
I wanted to just take in the sights...of the open sea in front, and the beautiful vegetation behind.
Everything looked so unspoilt...and life, seemed to go at a leisurely pace.

I do not think I could do justice by these descriptions of Chek Jawa.
I hope more people would go to the place, and check out one of the last natural places of beauty Singapore has to offer.
And of course, you must go with others who are willing to share that experience with you.
It was not just the place, but the company, that made the trip memorable.
It is truly something I will never forget.

So,if I get to go to Chek Jawa again,
would anyone like to follow?

What does it mean?

This one was more vivid than ever.

A lonely figure sat by the side of a pool of water.
A group of people came running along.
The leader stopped near that person and their eyes met for a while.
One pair questioning, the other mirroring a myriad of unspoken emotions.

But the last person stumbled suddenly.
One by one, they fell like dominos...
And the leader, in horror, hit the figure who fell into the water.
I saw ripples....
I saw a raised hand.
I saw a self...who was too tired to even struggle to survive.

While others watched in helpless horror,
I woke up with tears in my eyes.

I know you....but who are you?
I am sorry.

What do they mean?

Again, these past nights have been less than restful.
Maybe I tend to overeat dinner these days.
But when the mind is not quite settled, perhaps it can play tricks.

I see faces...some very familiar ones very distinctly.
They speak, but I hear no words.
I ask questions, yet get no replies.
Each time, the expressions do not reveal much either
...like people playing poker; not wanting to show the cards in their hands.

Blue...I see you with that....
The number I see is 6...
Each time,the clock chimes at that hour.
I look up and see a hand reaching out.

I cannot decipher what the symbols mean.
DearGod,
Do not lead me astray but what I see.
Ameen

Time is Short

There are plenty of cliches out there about time, and how precious time is.
Yesterday, when I was sms-ing Sky , I had somehow mentioned to him that this holidays, I tried to do as many things as I had wanted to.  When I texted that 'time is limited', he got rather concerned.

But you know what I mean.
Time is not something that we are able to control.
On an even bigger idea, we know that we are all living on borrowed time - that our hourglasses turned the moment we are born, and that steadily, the sands of time will slip down without us really realising it.

So it is back to choices...
If life is short...how do we choose to live our lives?
Somehow, it is always easier to allow the 'negatives' take over.
That way, we always have something to 'blame' when things do not go right.
We have allowed to feel low and sorry...for we are the 'victims'...
Really?

This is not a holier-than-thou kind of writing.
This is something I want to think about as the year comes to an end,and the new year is about to begin.

What if...2009 is my last year? Or the next?
That I will never know.
But I hope I will be able to feel grateful for a life fulfilled.

Dear God,
Thank you for letting me see another sunrise.
Let me live it to the fullest...in Your ways.
Ameen

Family Time

Initially I had wanted to continue about the Chek Jawa trip, but instead, I will write about what I did with my family over the past few days.

My Abah (father) does not much 'family' besides us - his wife and children and grandchildren.  Unlike Mak who has such a large extended family and is very outgoing and sociable, Abah is more reserved.  When I was growing up, he was always very busy...and emphasised that whatever he did, was for his family.  And now that he is getting on in years, he spends a lot more time 'making up' time, with his grandkids. Yes, he is still the disciplinarian, but the children respect his quiet authority.

When my principal came with me to Pakcik Samad's funeral the other day, she got to observe Akmal and Abah.  They recited verses from the Quran together, and when they were done, Abah took time to explain to Akmal a few things about what needs to be done with the jenazah (body).  It was then that Mrs Yeow make this remark." Your son seems so mature and sensible.  It is nice to see him listening to his grandfather. You need to have them building that strong bond in order for values to be passed down."
Alhamdulillah....Thank you to both my parents for having such a strong hand in raising my kids right.

Anyway, on Christmas Day, Abah wanted us to have lunch together.  My brother and his family had gone off on a holiday, and so it was just me and sis, and our brood.  We made our way down to Arab Street (but Pariaman was closed) and had a feast at 7 Jalan Pisang.  Why did I put down that address?  While it is now part of Hjh Maimunah's Restaraunt, the place where we had our meal was the place my mum, myself and sis grew up.  It was my late grandma's house.

It was a little sad reminiscing about the place...of course the features had changed, and but we tried to place the old ambin (wooden platform where we had our meals or slept), the airwell near the toilets, or the narrow passageways were we had hours of endless fun.

And amid the stories of yesteryears, we of course tucked in on a feast of nasi padang and all its lauk.(dishes).  When I first ordered, Mak was worried that we may not be able to finish...but when you are in the company of people you love...somehow, your appetites grow bigger.  It was nice to see Mak and Abah enjoying the meal despite the racket made by their curious grandkids.

You know, every Hari Raya, after I have met my parents and sought their forgiveness and blessings, I say a pray to Allah for giving me the chance to spend another special day with my parents.  Life , is unpredictable, and each opportunity I get to be with them, is a gift from heaven.  I will cherish each living moment....both theirs and mine....and make as many wonderful memories as possible.

I hope, one day, my children too, will say that prayer for me.

Dear God,
Thank you for giving me the best family possible.
Keep us in Your care and love....
Ameen

Memories made in the rain (Part I)

I have always wanted to take my kids to Chek Jawa.  I have spoke about it in class, and got the students to read up and write about the place.  The only thing left for me to do was actually to be there physically. 

If there was anything I learnt this holidays, it was that if I wanted something badly: - just do it.  Do not wait for reasons, or make up excuses not do so.  I had to wait for Zaf's return for I need a guide, but I was sure Evi and Erico would  love to join me.  Somehow, Faz also got wind that I was going, and so got all excited about it.

The plan was to look at the weather in the morning before deciding to go.  But that's it...no excuses for it had rained incessantly since 6.30am.  By the time we boarded the bus to Changi Village, the skies were thickly grey, and we were pelted down by the drops that fell from the heavens above.

We decided to fill our stomachs with yummy nasi lemak and teh tarik.  I am not much of a rice person, so I had mee rebus and teh-O.  While the rain fell steadily, we got into animated conversations that ranged from photography to shopping malls to almost anything under the sun for almost an hour.

With no indication of a letup in the weather, we decided to make a move to Changi Jetty.  Of course, it was a calculated risk to board a bumboat in rainy weather, for the water would have been very choppy.  They were benefits though for the rain washed away all the smell of diesel.

Anyway, our adventures began on the island itself.  Since we were already wet, there was no need to hire the van.  It would been more fun cycling to the wetlands itself. We donned pink ponchos (I had a yellow one which made me look like Winnie the Pooh), and at some point, I was reminded of a scene in ET the movie where the boys were frantically cycling before they flew into the sky.

Boy, did the rain pour then.  Part of me wished I had winshield wipers over my eyes to wipe away the droplets. We had 4 energetic teens who had to patiently wait for the 40 going on 14 -year-old 'aunties' whose creaking joints could not paddle as fast as them.

But for me, the bicyle ride was an instant reminder of my growing up years.
There was something so thrilling to be soaked to the bone by the rain, without the worries of falling sick.
The muddy, oft-beaten tracks were lined with dense foliage, but how wonderful it was to breathe clean, pure oxygen.
I had to quell a sudden urge to jump into the puddles of water and do a little dance of joy.

It was therapeutic...as if the rain was also cleansing the mind and spirit.
We stopped to gaze at the flora and fauna...simply to appreciate God's creations.  I saw trees which seemed to be calling out to me to climb them.  In my mind, I was the little girl again, at Wak Menah's kampung ...enjoying the simple things that life has to offer.
Most of the time, we cycled in single files, but the young men would often stop and wait to ensure that the ladies were not left behind. 

That's the first part...I'll continue maybe for the next entry.

Dear God,
Today, everything that I saw and experienced, reminded me of Your greatness and benevolence.
You are the Al-Mighty, the All-Knowing.
I am humbled.
And thank you for the rain...for we  had the best time of time. Alhamdulillah
Ameen