At the workshop on Transactional Analysis, I learnt more about the games people play, and gained a better understanding of these games can be so potentially dangerous. I also realised that no matter how hard it is, I get drawn into these 'games', and that is where very often, a person's integrity, reliability, honesty and trust are put on the line.
I know who my friends are in my workplace...and I know who are the people whom I can trust. But I also know that it is not easy putting a team of people of diverse personalities and interests together to work as a team. It takes all kind...and when you do not have people who share the same goals, very often, you can get stuck in a terrible jam. When that happens, frustration builds up...and a lot of unhappiness is created.
I have learnt that I cannot please everyone...and that is almost impossible to please everyone. I myself, am full of short-comings, but I do try to give my best.
So even though I feel like banging my head against the wall repeatedly at times, I am still so very glad that I have my friends who do share the same committment and goals. For that, I am thankful.
The show must go on they say. And to quote from Shakespeare's plays
"All the world's a stage, and all the men and women merely players: they have their exits and their entrances; and one man in his time plays many parts."
"Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage,
And then is heard no more. It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing."
Smart man, Good Old Will. We are all in put in the world to act out our roles.
But I do want to be heard....and I do want to tell a tale of significance.
So I shall watch what I say, and make sure that I am not that idiot....
Friday, May 30, 2008
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Just for Today - A ReVisit
Still feeling red today. So re-read one of the better books available -
John Maxwell's "Today Matters." I realise that his books have influenced me quite a bit, and that I am more grounded lately since I make it a point to consciously reflect on how I lead my life.
The entry today is just my version of "Just for Today"
Just for today...I will choose to make the best of whatever situation
I am in. No matter what mood I am in.
Just for today... I will choose and display the right attitudes towards
my loved ones, friends, colleagues and students.
Just for today...I will be generous and give 'positive strokes' to
others who deserve them.
Just for today...I will make the effort to make someone smile.
Just for today...I will deepen and live out my faith.
Just for today...I will reflect on my mistakes and improve.
Just for today...I will be true to the values I believe in.
Just for today...I will be less hasty and value good judgements.
Just for today...I will be grateful for the fact that I have a life that is more
blessed than others.
...Then one day... I will see the results of a day lived well.
I am living my life...and taking responsibility for myself. What about you?
John Maxwell's "Today Matters." I realise that his books have influenced me quite a bit, and that I am more grounded lately since I make it a point to consciously reflect on how I lead my life.
The entry today is just my version of "Just for Today"
Just for today...I will choose to make the best of whatever situation
I am in. No matter what mood I am in.
Just for today... I will choose and display the right attitudes towards
my loved ones, friends, colleagues and students.
Just for today...I will be generous and give 'positive strokes' to
others who deserve them.
Just for today...I will make the effort to make someone smile.
Just for today...I will deepen and live out my faith.
Just for today...I will reflect on my mistakes and improve.
Just for today...I will be true to the values I believe in.
Just for today...I will be less hasty and value good judgements.
Just for today...I will be grateful for the fact that I have a life that is more
blessed than others.
...Then one day... I will see the results of a day lived well.
I am living my life...and taking responsibility for myself. What about you?
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
I am not your Minder.
I make no apologies for the tone of today's entry.
I am MAD...absolutely furious...(but don't worry. You won't find me having to resort to colourful toot words to vent my anger. I still find that so beneath me).
Why am I raving and ranting? Why am I about to throw a mega tantrum?
Simple: I am sick and tired of being nice. Being nice toot big time. Because when you are nice, people take advantage, and treat you like a doormat. They walk all over you.
Sometimes, it does not do me any good to be accomodating to others; to take into account the concerns and feelings of other people. Why? Because in return...over and over again, I get stepped on. My own feelings do not matter...Oh toot! toot!toot!
Don't I ever learn? For all my advice to others, I myself have failed to listen. So if I get knocked out flat, and hit in the head over and over again, it is probably now because I deserve it for being so toot toot stupid....and naive...and gullible...and silly for believing in the goodness of human nature... Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!!!
Hold your head high, and keep your fists low...I have never fought dirty. I have never hit below the belt. I don't fight...I am usually the one who moves away.
But...do not underestimate me...do not take me for granted...do not assume that I am
spineless. Just do not back me to a corner...for I....
Come on Dee...Be strong...
I am MAD...absolutely furious...(but don't worry. You won't find me having to resort to colourful toot words to vent my anger. I still find that so beneath me).
Why am I raving and ranting? Why am I about to throw a mega tantrum?
Simple: I am sick and tired of being nice. Being nice toot big time. Because when you are nice, people take advantage, and treat you like a doormat. They walk all over you.
Sometimes, it does not do me any good to be accomodating to others; to take into account the concerns and feelings of other people. Why? Because in return...over and over again, I get stepped on. My own feelings do not matter...Oh toot! toot!toot!
Don't I ever learn? For all my advice to others, I myself have failed to listen. So if I get knocked out flat, and hit in the head over and over again, it is probably now because I deserve it for being so toot toot stupid....and naive...and gullible...and silly for believing in the goodness of human nature... Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!!!
Hold your head high, and keep your fists low...I have never fought dirty. I have never hit below the belt. I don't fight...I am usually the one who moves away.
But...do not underestimate me...do not take me for granted...do not assume that I am
spineless. Just do not back me to a corner...for I....
Come on Dee...Be strong...
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
Anthology of CCSS Paranormal Stories
Part I
I had to dig up a collection of the strange encounters I experienced the past 19 years in the school. Somehow, these strange tales never failed to capture the attention of students...no matter what age. Well, I guess I better record them now and share.
"Communication does not need words"
This incident happened to one of the teachers, and it is certainly something that boggles the mind. I wonder how she can ever return to that room since that incident.
She teaches a subject that encourages creativity, and her lessons are always interesting and interactive. She wanted her students to learn more look at the environment around them, and try to draw out lesson from them; to look at things from different perspectives.
"Sometimes, you do not need words to communicate. Look at the plants and flowers. They will speak to you. Translate what they tell you into your drawings." She told the eager young minds. Wow...so profound. I did wonder how many of the kids really knew what that meant.
After the lesson ended and the students had left, she was left in the room alone, and went to the corner to do some work. In the humid, lazy afternoon, she could feel there was something more troublesome than just the heat.
Minutes passed in silence as she became absorbed in her work. The air in the room has become very stifling indeed. She glanced to her left and right, feeling as if she was being watched. Do the walls really have eyes and ears?
Then something caught her attention. She became extremely still.
The overhead projector came on, and the screen was lit up. The room became extra quiet, and it was as if, the noise outside was cut off totally. She was startled momentarily, and thought she had forgotten to switch off the power supply. But then, the switches in the room have always seemed to play tricks with her.
The laptop that has been shut down came to life...(mind you, ours is password protected and would need the code keyed in before it can work)....beside her...the side door slammed shut. There had not even been the slightest breeze blowing at all.
She took a calming breath and decided that a power surge was behind the happenings. But then...her powerpoint presentation, the one with the title "Silent Communication" appeared on the screen. Big and bold, the words screamed in her mind.
She could feel the end of her toes and fingers tingling, prickling. She felt ITS presence in the room with her. IT moved even closer up to her. She knew IT was there...somewhere...
"Do you want to tell me something?"
Click....the next slide came on.
"Do I know you?" ...click, the next picture moved.
She sat quietly down on the chair, quite unable to move. Her heart was in her mouth, and she was torn between wanting to run away in fear, and desperation in wanting to understand what she thought was IT.
"Are you ok?"...nothing moved. The slide remained at the same picture.
"Are you unhappy?" Click...the next picture came on.
She felt she though IT was hovering near her...beckoning her. A cool breath blew against her face and she closed her eyes momentarily...looking...but not seeing anything.
Crash...a small sculpture fell onto the floor. She jumped back in fear.
"But I am so sorry...I don't know how I can help you...I..I..." she stammered , and felt it was necessary to leave the room.
Immediately, the slides were shown in a confused series, at an amazing speed. Another door slammed shut. She sensed IT's growing frustration.
She decided to walk out at that moment...but something made her turn back to look at the screen again. The slides were shown faster now...moved by an invinsible remote...
"I wish you can tell me how...I do want to help." she said, muttering a prayer quietly. "I really do."
And then, as the presentation came to an end, the programme closed by itself. The laptop did an automatic shutdown, while the light from the projector died.
Had she imagined it? Had she been so tired...and missing someone so much, that she had managed to reach out to the other dimension?
She can't tell for sure...except that she was a badly shaken person who came into the staff room later...who would believe her ?
I do...for the remains of that broken sculpture was there on the floor. No hallucination would can ever explain why the piece that came crashing to the ground was the creation....of someone we have lost........
Is this the end? No...there are other encounters...but each one as unexplainable as the other...Is IT still there? ....I am not telling.
I had to dig up a collection of the strange encounters I experienced the past 19 years in the school. Somehow, these strange tales never failed to capture the attention of students...no matter what age. Well, I guess I better record them now and share.
"Communication does not need words"
This incident happened to one of the teachers, and it is certainly something that boggles the mind. I wonder how she can ever return to that room since that incident.
She teaches a subject that encourages creativity, and her lessons are always interesting and interactive. She wanted her students to learn more look at the environment around them, and try to draw out lesson from them; to look at things from different perspectives.
"Sometimes, you do not need words to communicate. Look at the plants and flowers. They will speak to you. Translate what they tell you into your drawings." She told the eager young minds. Wow...so profound. I did wonder how many of the kids really knew what that meant.
After the lesson ended and the students had left, she was left in the room alone, and went to the corner to do some work. In the humid, lazy afternoon, she could feel there was something more troublesome than just the heat.
Minutes passed in silence as she became absorbed in her work. The air in the room has become very stifling indeed. She glanced to her left and right, feeling as if she was being watched. Do the walls really have eyes and ears?
Then something caught her attention. She became extremely still.
The overhead projector came on, and the screen was lit up. The room became extra quiet, and it was as if, the noise outside was cut off totally. She was startled momentarily, and thought she had forgotten to switch off the power supply. But then, the switches in the room have always seemed to play tricks with her.
The laptop that has been shut down came to life...(mind you, ours is password protected and would need the code keyed in before it can work)....beside her...the side door slammed shut. There had not even been the slightest breeze blowing at all.
She took a calming breath and decided that a power surge was behind the happenings. But then...her powerpoint presentation, the one with the title "Silent Communication" appeared on the screen. Big and bold, the words screamed in her mind.
She could feel the end of her toes and fingers tingling, prickling. She felt ITS presence in the room with her. IT moved even closer up to her. She knew IT was there...somewhere...
"Do you want to tell me something?"
Click....the next slide came on.
"Do I know you?" ...click, the next picture moved.
She sat quietly down on the chair, quite unable to move. Her heart was in her mouth, and she was torn between wanting to run away in fear, and desperation in wanting to understand what she thought was IT.
"Are you ok?"...nothing moved. The slide remained at the same picture.
"Are you unhappy?" Click...the next picture came on.
She felt she though IT was hovering near her...beckoning her. A cool breath blew against her face and she closed her eyes momentarily...looking...but not seeing anything.
Crash...a small sculpture fell onto the floor. She jumped back in fear.
"But I am so sorry...I don't know how I can help you...I..I..." she stammered , and felt it was necessary to leave the room.
Immediately, the slides were shown in a confused series, at an amazing speed. Another door slammed shut. She sensed IT's growing frustration.
She decided to walk out at that moment...but something made her turn back to look at the screen again. The slides were shown faster now...moved by an invinsible remote...
"I wish you can tell me how...I do want to help." she said, muttering a prayer quietly. "I really do."
And then, as the presentation came to an end, the programme closed by itself. The laptop did an automatic shutdown, while the light from the projector died.
Had she imagined it? Had she been so tired...and missing someone so much, that she had managed to reach out to the other dimension?
She can't tell for sure...except that she was a badly shaken person who came into the staff room later...who would believe her ?
I do...for the remains of that broken sculpture was there on the floor. No hallucination would can ever explain why the piece that came crashing to the ground was the creation....of someone we have lost........
Is this the end? No...there are other encounters...but each one as unexplainable as the other...Is IT still there? ....I am not telling.
To Love a Child
It is simply amazing what you can find over the net. Just as I was thinking about how not to get mad over the petty, insignificant things that kids sometimes do, I came across a blog by a teacher,( who in turn had found this gem from another educator) about how to reach out to children.
I want to share it with one and all, and hope that it will serve as a reminder for us to cherish what we have.[and to my many, many special children out there, know the power of these words.]
99 Ways to Love Your Child:
Accept Admire Adore Advise Advocate Aid Allow Amaze Answer Applaud Appreciate Approve Ask Assist Assure Attend Believe Care Carry Celebrate Challenge Champion Charm Cheer Cherish Comfort Commit Compliment Confide Consider Console Defend Devote Discipline Discover Educate Empathize Empower Encourage Endorse Enlighten Excite Explain Guide Hear Hold Honor Hope Hug Imagine Influence Inspire Involve Join Kiss Know Laugh Learn Like Limit Listen Marvel Motivate Need Notice Nourish Nurture Observe Offer Participate Play Please Praise Protect Provide Recognise Regard Respect Respond Show Smile Speak Squeeze Stimulate Suggest Supervise Support Surprise Talk Teach Thank Train Treasure Trust Understand Value Watch Wish Wonder.
Hold their hand so that they can walk, let go so that they can run, cheer so that they can fly!
(By Trine Meyer Vogsland , who teaches English as a second language in Norway)http://home.cogeco.ca/~rayser3/writing.htm
But I think I want to add a few of my own...of how to love a child.
1. Acknowledge the efforts made...no matter how big or small
2. Bless them each day with a prayer for their safety
3. Clarify your stand,so that they know your actions are governed by love.
4. Discuss issues with open hearts and open minds, and not be quick to judge.
5. Enjoy their company, for they are dear to you.
Well,I'll add a bit at a time. Just remember this...no matter what age you are, you'll always be somebody's child. So be nice to every single human being...and love them, as you wish to be loved yourself.
I want to share it with one and all, and hope that it will serve as a reminder for us to cherish what we have.[and to my many, many special children out there, know the power of these words.]
99 Ways to Love Your Child:
Accept Admire Adore Advise Advocate Aid Allow Amaze Answer Applaud Appreciate Approve Ask Assist Assure Attend Believe Care Carry Celebrate Challenge Champion Charm Cheer Cherish Comfort Commit Compliment Confide Consider Console Defend Devote Discipline Discover Educate Empathize Empower Encourage Endorse Enlighten Excite Explain Guide Hear Hold Honor Hope Hug Imagine Influence Inspire Involve Join Kiss Know Laugh Learn Like Limit Listen Marvel Motivate Need Notice Nourish Nurture Observe Offer Participate Play Please Praise Protect Provide Recognise Regard Respect Respond Show Smile Speak Squeeze Stimulate Suggest Supervise Support Surprise Talk Teach Thank Train Treasure Trust Understand Value Watch Wish Wonder.
Hold their hand so that they can walk, let go so that they can run, cheer so that they can fly!
(By Trine Meyer Vogsland , who teaches English as a second language in Norway)http://home.cogeco.ca/~rayser3/writing.htm
But I think I want to add a few of my own...of how to love a child.
1. Acknowledge the efforts made...no matter how big or small
2. Bless them each day with a prayer for their safety
3. Clarify your stand,so that they know your actions are governed by love.
4. Discuss issues with open hearts and open minds, and not be quick to judge.
5. Enjoy their company, for they are dear to you.
Well,I'll add a bit at a time. Just remember this...no matter what age you are, you'll always be somebody's child. So be nice to every single human being...and love them, as you wish to be loved yourself.
Sunday, May 25, 2008
Technosaurus Rex: The Update
You may know by now that I intend to close the other blog. So I have been sifting through some of my old entries and transferring them over. In this one that I have brought over, I will update about my place in the technological world of today.
I realise I am on my way to extinction...why do I say that? Of course...we are mere mortals, and we know that our stay here on earth is not permanent...but I am not talking about that actually...I am looking at how, within a space of a few years, old age has set in, and technological advancement is light years ahead of me...
Signs of a Technosaurus Rex
1. I still love my old log (logarithm) book dearly...nope, I took so long to master using that book...so even though the scientific calculator is there...I'd rather open up to look for the sine and cosine values. Besides, that book is practically an antique, and will always serve as a constant reminder that...at one point, I need not use some gadget to help me do my sums!
2. Er...I bought a calculator with impressive functions...(ya..ya..got to look as though I can do statistical calculations)..but give me good old pen and paper to do my sums....{when I run out of fingers & toes). It took me a while to find the off button;let alone the other keys. {A year on...I think that calculator is somewhere in cold storage. Who on earth would bother with standard deviation when World Peace and World Hunger are such major issues now?]
3. I should have stuck to idiot-proof phones...I buy my handphone because it is 'pretty'...so please don't ask me about functions like blue-tooth or infra-red..(see...even that I am outdated)...It is my kids who add in stuff like pictures and songs...and when they change the ring tone...I'm sure to have a lot of missed calls. [Oh...have you heard the latest 3-D acoustic virtual haircut? Zafran let me listen to it...and I got the chills...gee...I don't want to have buzzing sounds in my ears]
4. I have new-fangled gizmos at home...and have yet to master the PS, Xbox, PSP...er...tetris anyone? By the way...I still keep my old-fashioned VCR...cos I can't even use the DVD remote. [But now...there's the Wee Wee Wee wii...can't live without it]
5. My impressive gadgets have often 'died' on me. Tokens, external hard disks, PDAs...they don't like me very much...God knows how much precious data I have lost...I regret throwing away my old files...So my work area is still like that of a karung guni man...but I am happier.
6. Oh...those of you who chat with me will know this one...I cannot understand the icons and smileys...For someone who is trained to look at words...I am terrible at intepreting the pics...er...Rebus books anyone?
7. I still send SMSs in full texts...oh e-mails as well...and of course, most of the time in blogs. Today, I went into the IRC just to find out what goes on...Took me about 1/2 hr to find a site...and then stared in horror as I could not understand what the kids were chatting about. I bet you that aliens have invaded the brains of the young and made them dyslexic as they cannot spell. And worse...they use 'alien speak'...you know, like Yoda in Star Wars...going against all conventions of the English Language.
8. I have yet to spend my $700 given by MOE for some gizmos to help with teaching and learning...I know my friends have gotten wireless powerpoint remotes...LCD screens, PDA phones...cameras...and what nots..Maybe I can dream...a cute super lightweight SONY VAIO...just because..."it is so damn pretty!" It is an accessory you see, not a tool.
9. Has anyone ever gone to a super-duper "intelligent building'? Wah...Even the elevator was so much clever than me...I went up and down twice and did not get anywhere...cos there were no buttons in the lift! Apparently, you need to punch in the code BEFORE you enter the lift...Duh...
10. The worst sign...when I look at my son's powerpoint slides, and realise his is more impressive than mine. Wow...animation, sounds...illustrations...and it took me so long to even master the 'slide show presentation ' button.
Well...I may be a dying breed...But I realise one thing...I will not give up without a fight...Hey...at least I have learnt to set up a blog (even though I don't think I will be able to add music and nice designs...)
But I do hope to have been able to show you..that the old...combined with the new...can still be a formidable force...
Well...that was the entry almost a year ago...But look at me now...Still the old dinosaur...but hey, I am learning to crawl. Here are the new signs of I've got wings.
1. I can still beat my kids at some of the Wii games. {But I hate it that the sensors do not take the strokes into account. My kids can hentam anyhow...and yet get those strikes!!!}
2. My blog is up and coming...wait lah...learning to put up pics (though will distort the fonts)
3. Yea...someone made me an administrator of the Facebook network and I have been posting the pics.
4. Hehehe...(drumroll please)..I'll be enrolling myself for the Advanced Diploma in ICT Standards course at the start of the new term.
5. Will be using a tablet attached to my laptop, and together with the interactive whiteboard...will teach using those...So that I can still write....
6. Fell in love with the iTouch and will get that as an excuse for Zafran's birthday present.
7. One step ahead of my kids...Yea...learning to use Adobe Ovation for my powerpoints...(since I cannot afford the MacBook).
I still have a long way to go...but I realise that I cannot afford to become obselete.
The only problem with technology is that they cost so much...and most of the gadgets have such a short-span. But the knowledge I gain from using them will I hope, carry on for much longer...So people out there...is there anything exciting that I can learn?
I realise I am on my way to extinction...why do I say that? Of course...we are mere mortals, and we know that our stay here on earth is not permanent...but I am not talking about that actually...I am looking at how, within a space of a few years, old age has set in, and technological advancement is light years ahead of me...
Signs of a Technosaurus Rex
1. I still love my old log (logarithm) book dearly...nope, I took so long to master using that book...so even though the scientific calculator is there...I'd rather open up to look for the sine and cosine values. Besides, that book is practically an antique, and will always serve as a constant reminder that...at one point, I need not use some gadget to help me do my sums!
2. Er...I bought a calculator with impressive functions...(ya..ya..got to look as though I can do statistical calculations)..but give me good old pen and paper to do my sums....{when I run out of fingers & toes). It took me a while to find the off button;let alone the other keys. {A year on...I think that calculator is somewhere in cold storage. Who on earth would bother with standard deviation when World Peace and World Hunger are such major issues now?]
3. I should have stuck to idiot-proof phones...I buy my handphone because it is 'pretty'...so please don't ask me about functions like blue-tooth or infra-red..(see...even that I am outdated)...It is my kids who add in stuff like pictures and songs...and when they change the ring tone...I'm sure to have a lot of missed calls. [Oh...have you heard the latest 3-D acoustic virtual haircut? Zafran let me listen to it...and I got the chills...gee...I don't want to have buzzing sounds in my ears]
4. I have new-fangled gizmos at home...and have yet to master the PS, Xbox, PSP...er...tetris anyone? By the way...I still keep my old-fashioned VCR...cos I can't even use the DVD remote. [But now...there's the Wee Wee Wee wii...can't live without it]
5. My impressive gadgets have often 'died' on me. Tokens, external hard disks, PDAs...they don't like me very much...God knows how much precious data I have lost...I regret throwing away my old files...So my work area is still like that of a karung guni man...but I am happier.
6. Oh...those of you who chat with me will know this one...I cannot understand the icons and smileys...For someone who is trained to look at words...I am terrible at intepreting the pics...er...Rebus books anyone?
7. I still send SMSs in full texts...oh e-mails as well...and of course, most of the time in blogs. Today, I went into the IRC just to find out what goes on...Took me about 1/2 hr to find a site...and then stared in horror as I could not understand what the kids were chatting about. I bet you that aliens have invaded the brains of the young and made them dyslexic as they cannot spell. And worse...they use 'alien speak'...you know, like Yoda in Star Wars...going against all conventions of the English Language.
8. I have yet to spend my $700 given by MOE for some gizmos to help with teaching and learning...I know my friends have gotten wireless powerpoint remotes...LCD screens, PDA phones...cameras...and what nots..Maybe I can dream...a cute super lightweight SONY VAIO...just because..."it is so damn pretty!" It is an accessory you see, not a tool.
9. Has anyone ever gone to a super-duper "intelligent building'? Wah...Even the elevator was so much clever than me...I went up and down twice and did not get anywhere...cos there were no buttons in the lift! Apparently, you need to punch in the code BEFORE you enter the lift...Duh...
10. The worst sign...when I look at my son's powerpoint slides, and realise his is more impressive than mine. Wow...animation, sounds...illustrations...and it took me so long to even master the 'slide show presentation ' button.
Well...I may be a dying breed...But I realise one thing...I will not give up without a fight...Hey...at least I have learnt to set up a blog (even though I don't think I will be able to add music and nice designs...)
But I do hope to have been able to show you..that the old...combined with the new...can still be a formidable force...
Well...that was the entry almost a year ago...But look at me now...Still the old dinosaur...but hey, I am learning to crawl. Here are the new signs of I've got wings.
1. I can still beat my kids at some of the Wii games. {But I hate it that the sensors do not take the strokes into account. My kids can hentam anyhow...and yet get those strikes!!!}
2. My blog is up and coming...wait lah...learning to put up pics (though will distort the fonts)
3. Yea...someone made me an administrator of the Facebook network and I have been posting the pics.
4. Hehehe...(drumroll please)..I'll be enrolling myself for the Advanced Diploma in ICT Standards course at the start of the new term.
5. Will be using a tablet attached to my laptop, and together with the interactive whiteboard...will teach using those...So that I can still write....
6. Fell in love with the iTouch and will get that as an excuse for Zafran's birthday present.
7. One step ahead of my kids...Yea...learning to use Adobe Ovation for my powerpoints...(since I cannot afford the MacBook).
I still have a long way to go...but I realise that I cannot afford to become obselete.
The only problem with technology is that they cost so much...and most of the gadgets have such a short-span. But the knowledge I gain from using them will I hope, carry on for much longer...So people out there...is there anything exciting that I can learn?
Saturday, May 24, 2008
The Great (?) Singapore Sale
It's sale season again...I mean, you know that somehow in our little red dot, there is always some kind of sales going on, but this is the Mother of All Sales...supposedly.
For the past few years too, the shopaholic in me loved looking forward to these moments - and like the experienced general going for war, I would have planned my strategy months in advanced...looking for the best bargains.
But sigh...not anymore. I had my usual pre-sale practice sessio, trawling up and down the Marina area, to the little lanes in Holland V. I came back empty-handed. Not because I was merely window-shopping, staking out items I would want to buy, but because there was simply....nothing to buy!
Actually, there is a reason behind this. You see, I found a new avenue for my vice...E-Bay...and it is a shopping paradise 24/7. I know where to find what I really, really want.
And it is really so much cheaper. Now I can really walk past the shops and take a good look at the prices they are offering. Goodness gracious me....It's absolutely cut-throat at the marked up charges.
I am sure good old Mr Postman is wondering why there seem to be a new package delivered to the house each day. Opps...it is getting so addictive.
Err..there is an e-bay shopaholic anonymous out there? Help!
For the past few years too, the shopaholic in me loved looking forward to these moments - and like the experienced general going for war, I would have planned my strategy months in advanced...looking for the best bargains.
But sigh...not anymore. I had my usual pre-sale practice sessio, trawling up and down the Marina area, to the little lanes in Holland V. I came back empty-handed. Not because I was merely window-shopping, staking out items I would want to buy, but because there was simply....nothing to buy!
Actually, there is a reason behind this. You see, I found a new avenue for my vice...E-Bay...and it is a shopping paradise 24/7. I know where to find what I really, really want.
And it is really so much cheaper. Now I can really walk past the shops and take a good look at the prices they are offering. Goodness gracious me....It's absolutely cut-throat at the marked up charges.
I am sure good old Mr Postman is wondering why there seem to be a new package delivered to the house each day. Opps...it is getting so addictive.
Err..there is an e-bay shopaholic anonymous out there? Help!
Friday, May 23, 2008
My heart goes out to the kids...
It's that time of the year...where we have loads of parents coming down to meet up with the other important people in their children' lives. They came down in droves...and that is so important.
But the reactions were different...from the way they came in with their children...to the myriad of expressions on their faces when they left - record books in hand.
Body language speaks volumes. There are those who came, with their hands entwined tightly to the child, others, the physical distance is obvious. Mothers draped their hands over the shoulders' of their strapping young sons, and dads planting affectionate peck atop the heads of their young ladies.
But then again, there were the hard, stony faces of both child and parent...animosity written all over. There was an angry mother who admonished the child is hard harsh tones in front of everyone. It did not matter if the young girl was holding back tears; embarrassed by the scene. Another got an earful of toot words...[no wonder the child has such vocab too]
But there were many parents who were genuinely concerned about the progress(regress?!!) of the child. No parent would want their child to fail.
For S and H...who were there with me, I am sorry that your parents did not turn up. I understand why your parents may not have wanted to come; thinking that you have let them down...and that must have hurt so much...
Sometimes, parents forget that the pain they inflict on the child, at a crucial time like this, can backfire. Emotional blackmail does not work all the time. The parents are angry, the child will also get angry...it is a lose-lose situation.
So S...if you read this, please, please remember that you may have lost this battle...but the war is still ahead of you. Strategise...and think...do not be so disheartened. Keep that chin up, and keep telling yourself you are capable of making it.
If this is your challenge, then face it. Do not allow your self-esteem to be broken. Keep remembering that you are special, and that you do have people who believe in you...and will keep on supporting you from behind. so keep on believing, ok?
But the reactions were different...from the way they came in with their children...to the myriad of expressions on their faces when they left - record books in hand.
Body language speaks volumes. There are those who came, with their hands entwined tightly to the child, others, the physical distance is obvious. Mothers draped their hands over the shoulders' of their strapping young sons, and dads planting affectionate peck atop the heads of their young ladies.
But then again, there were the hard, stony faces of both child and parent...animosity written all over. There was an angry mother who admonished the child is hard harsh tones in front of everyone. It did not matter if the young girl was holding back tears; embarrassed by the scene. Another got an earful of toot words...[no wonder the child has such vocab too]
But there were many parents who were genuinely concerned about the progress(regress?!!) of the child. No parent would want their child to fail.
For S and H...who were there with me, I am sorry that your parents did not turn up. I understand why your parents may not have wanted to come; thinking that you have let them down...and that must have hurt so much...
Sometimes, parents forget that the pain they inflict on the child, at a crucial time like this, can backfire. Emotional blackmail does not work all the time. The parents are angry, the child will also get angry...it is a lose-lose situation.
So S...if you read this, please, please remember that you may have lost this battle...but the war is still ahead of you. Strategise...and think...do not be so disheartened. Keep that chin up, and keep telling yourself you are capable of making it.
If this is your challenge, then face it. Do not allow your self-esteem to be broken. Keep remembering that you are special, and that you do have people who believe in you...and will keep on supporting you from behind. so keep on believing, ok?
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Wii....weeeee.....weeee.....weeeeee....funneeeeeee
I confess...I am not much of a gamer. The kinds of games I play online are word games...like Bookworm, or Textwist or Whatword...in the past...the handheld devices of yore were PacMan and Tetris...
So you can tempt with with PSP...or the latest XBox...and what nots...but they bore me. It's bad enough that the notebook has aggravated my carpal tunnel syndrome, so I don't think I want to twiddle my fingers on some controller which has a life of its own.
Until....I fell in love with Wii.
I saw the series of adverts of its pre-launch...and at the ICT conference last year at Republic Poly, it was so, so , so cool to see this almost interactive game set which allows the player greater mobility. I admit, the sales pitch about it being something that allows one to exercise is a great plus point.
I hemmed and hawed many many times before I decided to purchase one. I did not want my kids to get addicted to some machine. But the lure was too hard to resist. Finally, after checking it out for the umpteenth time, I caved in.
Weeeeeee.....weeeeeee.....weeeee..... I love it.
And over the long weekend, I spend a wonderful time, rebonding with the family through this little machine. Kudos to Nintendo for coming up with things that are more family-oriented.
Why do I love it?
One....it is almost idiot-proof to use...You just slip the remote over your wrist (clever...so you will not accidently throw the remote in your excitment) and sometimes hold the nunchuck in your other. [gee...for the life of me, i cannot figure out what the word means]. So the kids need not roll up their eyes having to explain how to use the controller to this technosaur rex. You really get the hang of it fast.
Two...I really get to work up a sweat...hehehe...you see, I did not realise that all I needed to do was just to flick the wrist to get an on-screen response. So when I played a game of virtual tennis... all the skills I know instinctively came back to place: from flinging the ball into the air during a serve, and even going to do a double backhand return. {thank you, Mr Quah...you were a fanastic coach...even the footwork was right). But mind you, if you want to play on Wii...please make sure that you clear the area. Otherwise, you'll be banging into things as you use some nifty moves.
Yes!Yes!Yes!...and for the first time...I won...(Yea!Yea!Yea!).Never mind the long rallies, and a near accident where I almost twisted my foot when I fell to 'return a serve'. [can you imagine that...first injury due to virtual tennis?].Makes me want to pick up my racket again and start playing in school.
And then, there is bowling...for those of you who have not seen me bowl, let me tell you this...actually, I have very little hand power. So what I lack in strength, I make up with accuracy. So my style is what my family calls 'slow-mo bo". No spins, no curls...but a straight line to the first pin to create a domino effect to get a strike. I can roll the ball first...and a person who starts later will likely hit the pin first before my ball reaches its destination...The best weight: a 10-pounder.
Anway, of course on Wii..you will not have the weight of the ball on hand...but I can still release with accuracy...(yea...turkey...turkey...)
But I guess, at this moment, best of all, is the amount of fun the whole family experiences when we play together. I see the younger ones engaged in this game with a whole series of rabid rabbits (I think)...and it's non-stop laughter. My next play time, I want to cook up a storm...or join the Super Mario brothers in some kind of space galaxy adventures.
I am grateful that this week...I got to laugh...and laugh..and laugh...something to really chase the blues away. But I guess, nothing beats the real thing...
So is there anyone out there who wants to bowl or play tennis with me this school holidays?
So you can tempt with with PSP...or the latest XBox...and what nots...but they bore me. It's bad enough that the notebook has aggravated my carpal tunnel syndrome, so I don't think I want to twiddle my fingers on some controller which has a life of its own.
Until....I fell in love with Wii.
I saw the series of adverts of its pre-launch...and at the ICT conference last year at Republic Poly, it was so, so , so cool to see this almost interactive game set which allows the player greater mobility. I admit, the sales pitch about it being something that allows one to exercise is a great plus point.
I hemmed and hawed many many times before I decided to purchase one. I did not want my kids to get addicted to some machine. But the lure was too hard to resist. Finally, after checking it out for the umpteenth time, I caved in.
Weeeeeee.....weeeeeee.....weeeee..... I love it.
And over the long weekend, I spend a wonderful time, rebonding with the family through this little machine. Kudos to Nintendo for coming up with things that are more family-oriented.
Why do I love it?
One....it is almost idiot-proof to use...You just slip the remote over your wrist (clever...so you will not accidently throw the remote in your excitment) and sometimes hold the nunchuck in your other. [gee...for the life of me, i cannot figure out what the word means]. So the kids need not roll up their eyes having to explain how to use the controller to this technosaur rex. You really get the hang of it fast.
Two...I really get to work up a sweat...hehehe...you see, I did not realise that all I needed to do was just to flick the wrist to get an on-screen response. So when I played a game of virtual tennis... all the skills I know instinctively came back to place: from flinging the ball into the air during a serve, and even going to do a double backhand return. {thank you, Mr Quah...you were a fanastic coach...even the footwork was right). But mind you, if you want to play on Wii...please make sure that you clear the area. Otherwise, you'll be banging into things as you use some nifty moves.
Yes!Yes!Yes!...and for the first time...I won...(Yea!Yea!Yea!).Never mind the long rallies, and a near accident where I almost twisted my foot when I fell to 'return a serve'. [can you imagine that...first injury due to virtual tennis?].Makes me want to pick up my racket again and start playing in school.
And then, there is bowling...for those of you who have not seen me bowl, let me tell you this...actually, I have very little hand power. So what I lack in strength, I make up with accuracy. So my style is what my family calls 'slow-mo bo". No spins, no curls...but a straight line to the first pin to create a domino effect to get a strike. I can roll the ball first...and a person who starts later will likely hit the pin first before my ball reaches its destination...The best weight: a 10-pounder.
Anway, of course on Wii..you will not have the weight of the ball on hand...but I can still release with accuracy...(yea...turkey...turkey...)
But I guess, at this moment, best of all, is the amount of fun the whole family experiences when we play together. I see the younger ones engaged in this game with a whole series of rabid rabbits (I think)...and it's non-stop laughter. My next play time, I want to cook up a storm...or join the Super Mario brothers in some kind of space galaxy adventures.
I am grateful that this week...I got to laugh...and laugh..and laugh...something to really chase the blues away. But I guess, nothing beats the real thing...
So is there anyone out there who wants to bowl or play tennis with me this school holidays?
Friday, May 16, 2008
Just Answer the Question: The Art of Beating Around the Bush
This entry is for all the kids who have endured my lessons all these years.
Sigh...am I realy that ineffective that no one gets it right?
Today, as part of the racial harmony concert publicity blitz, the younger teachers decided that they were game enough to put on a skit. The idea came up suddenly during one of the afternoons when we were all so stressed up marking the exam scripts. After 5pm, we were all so worn out, the eyes getting bloodshot squinting over the miniscule handwriting (the smaller the writing, the less mistakes my teacher will be able to detect...geddit?)
"Lets emulate them..." Serene was trying to coax Valerie into putting up an act. Well, no amount of persuasion nor threats would make Val budge, so Serene decided to entice Eunice instead. I watched them rummage through the stock of uniforms kept and laughed...They sure could pull it off.
It brought back the days when I could gamely perform. Oh...I do love the stage...coming into character, and taking on roles. I loved the bright lights, and the excitment of putting a show together. But I guess...maybe I'm just a little too old and too jaded.
But it was ok..I could still go on stage, and at least read out the announcements. But of late...I guess, I must seem like a stuffy old mother hen up there, constantly clucking and nagging at the kids.
Then this morning...these two ladies caught me by surprise. I had totally forgotten that Friday was the day when they were going out to spring their moment of fun in front of the whole school....now, that takes guts. Hehe...there they were...the Ah Lian and the Geeky Goody-Two Shoes.
Backstage, it was a total riot as the ELDDS kids could not contain their laughter watching their antics. Once in a while, they got to see the 'true colours' of their usually staid teachers.
"So how...you game or not?"
Huh?
"Never mind ah...you become the teacher.."
Hehe...I already am the teacher. So heck,(ooopps), why not? I guess once in a while, it's ok.
So with no script on hand, and relying on the ability to think on our feet, we ad-libbed the script. My two friends were hilarious...and I guess kept the students in stitches with their realistic portrayal of the sterotypical kids we have.
Me? Acting?...Who said I was acting? All I had to do was to be myself...and I guess it was such a revelation when I heard the whole upper gallery roaring with laughter when I said, "Hello...just answer the question!"
They remembered...Yipee...they remembered after the little 'torture' of a session they had in the stuffy hall the previous day.
I can't remember much what happened after that...but I do know that some of the younger kids are asking whether they can have more of such skits by their two cute teachers.
Eunice on the other hand, came quietly to my table a little later in the evening. There was an undescribable expression on her face..."Er...Mdm D, is that the way you behave in class?"
I nodded...
"Er...do you know...you are...scary?"
Scary? Me?
Hehehehehehehehehehehehe..........
now...what does the title of this entry have to do with the content of this blog?
ABSOLUTELY NOTHING !!!!!
and that , my dear kids, what I am trying to show you.
PLEASE ANSWER THE QUESTION!!! hehehehehehehehe
Sigh...am I realy that ineffective that no one gets it right?
Today, as part of the racial harmony concert publicity blitz, the younger teachers decided that they were game enough to put on a skit. The idea came up suddenly during one of the afternoons when we were all so stressed up marking the exam scripts. After 5pm, we were all so worn out, the eyes getting bloodshot squinting over the miniscule handwriting (the smaller the writing, the less mistakes my teacher will be able to detect...geddit?)
"Lets emulate them..." Serene was trying to coax Valerie into putting up an act. Well, no amount of persuasion nor threats would make Val budge, so Serene decided to entice Eunice instead. I watched them rummage through the stock of uniforms kept and laughed...They sure could pull it off.
It brought back the days when I could gamely perform. Oh...I do love the stage...coming into character, and taking on roles. I loved the bright lights, and the excitment of putting a show together. But I guess...maybe I'm just a little too old and too jaded.
But it was ok..I could still go on stage, and at least read out the announcements. But of late...I guess, I must seem like a stuffy old mother hen up there, constantly clucking and nagging at the kids.
Then this morning...these two ladies caught me by surprise. I had totally forgotten that Friday was the day when they were going out to spring their moment of fun in front of the whole school....now, that takes guts. Hehe...there they were...the Ah Lian and the Geeky Goody-Two Shoes.
Backstage, it was a total riot as the ELDDS kids could not contain their laughter watching their antics. Once in a while, they got to see the 'true colours' of their usually staid teachers.
"So how...you game or not?"
Huh?
"Never mind ah...you become the teacher.."
Hehe...I already am the teacher. So heck,(ooopps), why not? I guess once in a while, it's ok.
So with no script on hand, and relying on the ability to think on our feet, we ad-libbed the script. My two friends were hilarious...and I guess kept the students in stitches with their realistic portrayal of the sterotypical kids we have.
Me? Acting?...Who said I was acting? All I had to do was to be myself...and I guess it was such a revelation when I heard the whole upper gallery roaring with laughter when I said, "Hello...just answer the question!"
They remembered...Yipee...they remembered after the little 'torture' of a session they had in the stuffy hall the previous day.
I can't remember much what happened after that...but I do know that some of the younger kids are asking whether they can have more of such skits by their two cute teachers.
Eunice on the other hand, came quietly to my table a little later in the evening. There was an undescribable expression on her face..."Er...Mdm D, is that the way you behave in class?"
I nodded...
"Er...do you know...you are...scary?"
Scary? Me?
Hehehehehehehehehehehehe..........
now...what does the title of this entry have to do with the content of this blog?
ABSOLUTELY NOTHING !!!!!
and that , my dear kids, what I am trying to show you.
PLEASE ANSWER THE QUESTION!!! hehehehehehehehe
Thursday, May 15, 2008
Duh Male: Blame it on the Y
Today's entry is courtesy of Zafran who 'inspired' me in my life-long search as to find the answer why men and women are different.
I was grumbling earlier this evening about...(gee, I can't even remember why). But there we were, all around the dinner table, all talking at the same time, sounding like citizens from Babel. Can't quite sure what triggered me off, but I was telling them not to emulate certain behaviour of dear old daddy. ( Hehehe..when they are good, the are "my" darlings, when naughty.."You know your children ah...).I was muttering something about how the men in the house were really clueless about what they should be doing...and have to be told to do something for the umpteenth time.
My dear Other Half is a real classic in this department. On days when his mood tells him that it is time to help his harried wife clean the house, he will announce loudly that he will sweep the floor. I will wait for five seconds...for the next thing that happens is that "Dear..where is the broom?". I will tell him...and wait for the next five seconds..."Dear, er..where is the dustpan?"...Five seconds.."Magic mop got or not..."
You get the idea. But the end half an hour is over, I would have done the bed, and brought the laundry down...and he will still be searching all over for...that broom.
Anyway, as we were talking about genetics, Zafran said this piece of gem.
"Hey...you know Mama...you really cannot blame us...We inherited our Y chromosome from Daddy. That's why we always forget...just like him."
Ah? That's a new one. Finally he's making the connection between what he learns in bio class with real life application.
"Oh yes...and is that why you guys have short-term memories? And will only do when you are poked, prodded, pushed.? Or, each time I tell you to look for something, and it is right under your nose, you cannot see? Tsk..tsk..tsk...Males and their peripheral vision..." Whoa! I was really on a roll.
"You must understand...the male gene is shrinking...My teacher told me so. So we cannot do many things. You really must tell daddy and me what to do, over and over again." he continued.
I looked at my son incredulously. What on earth did his teacher tell him? That there is a co-relation between a male's brain with this sex chromosome?
"Really Ma..My bio teacher say so. The Y chromosome is getting....er...useless?(!)She says that is why we cannot multi-task."
Well, hooray for his Bio teacher for this wonderful revelation. Of course, my curiosity got the better of me...and so I spent some time trying to find out what this Y chromosome business is about.
To those who did not do much bio, basically we are a man or a woman because of our chromosomes. The Male species have one X and Y chromosome, while a woman is genetically made up of XX. (So boo to the men in the past who blames the wife for not giving him his male heirs...biologically, only a Man can father a man)
Anyway, here is what I found out (courtesy of Wikipedia)
and perhaps, this is what Zafran's teacher was trying to say. Apparently, the "human Y chromosome itself contains only 86 WORKING genes, compared to the 1000 WORKING genes in the X chromosomes." The Y chromosome is shrinking...and can eventually become 'genetic junk'
Hahahaha...it's that very telling? Men....tsk...tsk....tsk... It is really just in them.
Hey guys....watch out...You are going the way of the dinosaur...Hehehehehe.
I was grumbling earlier this evening about...(gee, I can't even remember why). But there we were, all around the dinner table, all talking at the same time, sounding like citizens from Babel. Can't quite sure what triggered me off, but I was telling them not to emulate certain behaviour of dear old daddy. ( Hehehe..when they are good, the are "my" darlings, when naughty.."You know your children ah...).I was muttering something about how the men in the house were really clueless about what they should be doing...and have to be told to do something for the umpteenth time.
My dear Other Half is a real classic in this department. On days when his mood tells him that it is time to help his harried wife clean the house, he will announce loudly that he will sweep the floor. I will wait for five seconds...for the next thing that happens is that "Dear..where is the broom?". I will tell him...and wait for the next five seconds..."Dear, er..where is the dustpan?"...Five seconds.."Magic mop got or not..."
You get the idea. But the end half an hour is over, I would have done the bed, and brought the laundry down...and he will still be searching all over for...that broom.
Anyway, as we were talking about genetics, Zafran said this piece of gem.
"Hey...you know Mama...you really cannot blame us...We inherited our Y chromosome from Daddy. That's why we always forget...just like him."
Ah? That's a new one. Finally he's making the connection between what he learns in bio class with real life application.
"Oh yes...and is that why you guys have short-term memories? And will only do when you are poked, prodded, pushed.? Or, each time I tell you to look for something, and it is right under your nose, you cannot see? Tsk..tsk..tsk...Males and their peripheral vision..." Whoa! I was really on a roll.
"You must understand...the male gene is shrinking...My teacher told me so. So we cannot do many things. You really must tell daddy and me what to do, over and over again." he continued.
I looked at my son incredulously. What on earth did his teacher tell him? That there is a co-relation between a male's brain with this sex chromosome?
"Really Ma..My bio teacher say so. The Y chromosome is getting....er...useless?(!)She says that is why we cannot multi-task."
Well, hooray for his Bio teacher for this wonderful revelation. Of course, my curiosity got the better of me...and so I spent some time trying to find out what this Y chromosome business is about.
To those who did not do much bio, basically we are a man or a woman because of our chromosomes. The Male species have one X and Y chromosome, while a woman is genetically made up of XX. (So boo to the men in the past who blames the wife for not giving him his male heirs...biologically, only a Man can father a man)
Anyway, here is what I found out (courtesy of Wikipedia)
and perhaps, this is what Zafran's teacher was trying to say. Apparently, the "human Y chromosome itself contains only 86 WORKING genes, compared to the 1000 WORKING genes in the X chromosomes." The Y chromosome is shrinking...and can eventually become 'genetic junk'
Hahahaha...it's that very telling? Men....tsk...tsk....tsk... It is really just in them.
Hey guys....watch out...You are going the way of the dinosaur...Hehehehehe.
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Oh to be young and carefree again (Taman Negara Adventures)
My Facebook account is abuzz with a group of old friends reminiscing about 'the good old days.' Sigh, I think most of us are facing some kind of mid-life crisis, realising that our best memories are the ones made when we were just about the same age as our children are nowadays. Until today, I guess it is still hard for my children to imagine their Mama ever being young.
This is for the group of kids who are going on an upcoming trip to Taman Negara. I hope you will have as much fun as I did.
After the final year in NUS, Abah finally allowed me to go on a hiking trip with my group of friends from campus. Granted, the group that went was helmed by pretty serious and well-grounded people (haha..Isa, Darwis, Mus...)I had half-expected his jaw to drop when I told him that there were only 3 girls in the group of 10. Yet he did not even blink an eyelid. (Hey guys...that's how much he trusted you people!!!)
Anyway, it was nothing short of a great adventure. We decided that it would really be a trip on a shoestring budget. We would only spend $200 for a week ...and that would include the transportation costs. (Wow Abdullah...you'll make a great finance minister). ...and when I say shoestring..., it was really a belt-tightening affair.
Part I: The Night Mail Train
If you think the KTM rail services leave much to be desired, try taking the mail train...3rd class. Ya..for the life of me, I cannot understand why all the seats had to go against the flow of traffic, and that the seats were designed for aneroxics. It was 'naturally ventilated', and mind you, as we chugged through the various parts of Johor, our various odiferous encounters is something I will not likely forget.
I thought I would only see scenes of packed trains in movies of India or Indonesia...here...we had our fair share of people boarding with crates of live chickens, or laden with durians. Nasarruddin had people putting babies on to him twice, for apparently, we were the only ones with labelled seats. The Malaysians used the train like the way we use the bus.
Oh we were thoroughly 'entertained'. In the days of the pre-ipod-mp3 era, people actually carried the big radios. Never mind if it was past midnight, you'll never be able to sleep. And because our haversacks were neatly laid in a row, they were the 'seats' to those people who just needed to rest their behinds...(oh...we stopped at all 17 smaller stations along the slow winding route.
Part II. Termerloh Station (Pahang)
It was raining cats and dogs when we arrived at our station at about 5.00am. I guess we were so used to associating the word 'station' with a decent building where we could take shelter. We were already wet even before disembarking...for we could not close the windows of the carriage.
At 5.00am, in a rural area, let me tell you that the place can get so dark that you cannot even see your hand in front of you. Wet, tired and grouchy, we just wanted to be able to set foot on solid ground.
Temerloh Station was...er...a little wooden hut(?)no bigger than our bus stop. There was no sign of a station master, and no lights.
The rain felt like pallets pounding on us, and it was indeed an ominous sign. We were drowned rats...and in the darkness, we knew it was impossible to make the hike to the next checkpoint, the jetty.
But that was not the highlight of our arrival. When a flash of lightning struck, and the place was momentarily lit, we saw 'her!'...Hehehe...no, this is not a ghost story (at least not yet).
In the muddy, water-logged post, was this cow...about to deliver her calf...The smell of cow dung, wet mud and the slight of all that blood made the stomachs churn. How could we take shelter with the cow in there?
Mind you, if I was a movie director, I will try to recreate this classic scene. The full glory of thunder and lightning,..the torrential rain...and 10 young people undecided whether to move in or remain where they were. (oh...the banana trees had a nice effect...you know...banana trees=....cik pon...hehehehe)
Suddenly Isa screamed bloody murder...and that set off the whole group screaming incessantly. (Why were we all screaming like this?)I don't care if my faith forbids the touching of the other gender who are not my 'muhrim', but I must have clung on to one of the guys in terror.
We calmed down soon enough. Apparently, the one who had suddenly materialised before us was indeed the station master himself....He was also the owner of the cow.
Something was not quite right about the cow. It was making funny moaning sounds..., and when a streak of lightning lit the sky again, we saw a pair of hind legs coming out...
"Oh no...The calf is breeched.." That came from Az...yup, the final-year medical student(Dr Azhar now, mind you..hehehe). The cow tried to stand up, but fell back with a loud thump.
"Guys...we got to help...we need to turn the calf around."
Huh? What was Az saying? That he intended to play mid-wife in the middle of a god-forsaken place? He dropped his backpack and moved towards the creature. The station master followed, and soon he was joined by Isa and Darwis.
I think my respect (nd crush then?...hehehe) for Az went up more than a few notches. Dollah too, who was crooning (ya...singing softly) to the frightened cow while the rest ensured that it did not move.
Very calmly, Az pushed the little legs up the cervix (I think)...and physically manipulated the little calf in the womb in the best position for birthing.
Suddenly the rain and thunderstorm no longer mattered. We were soaked to the skin, and I guess, I did throw up once or twice watching the drama that was unfolding before our eyes. We were watching a miracle...
I think after more than half an hour or so, the head of the calf emerged. It slid out easily, on to the dirty floor...but the calf did not move. The cow was already up, and ready to move despite her ordeal.
I choked back a sob...Were our effort in vain?
Again, Az was quick-witted. He fished out the penknife he had carried, and methodogically, cut the thin layer of goo and grime of the afterbirth. And to our surprise, he bent down, and blew gently a few puffs. He was performing CPR on a that little creature.
If you asked me if I have witnessed any miracles, this would be one of them. There was a gurgling sound, and Az suddenly spat a lot of yucky mucus from his mouth. And believe you me, there was never a wonderous sight, when the little lifeless creature started to kick its legs. The eyes opened slowly, and it finally breathed on its on. (Sigh Az...you are a hero in my eyes)
Well...as you can see, I am very long-winded. That's all for today. Stay tuned for more adventures I had at Endau Rompin...that many, many years ago. (Ya Zafran, do you think that Mama is such a princess again who cannot take the challenges of camp?)
This is for the group of kids who are going on an upcoming trip to Taman Negara. I hope you will have as much fun as I did.
After the final year in NUS, Abah finally allowed me to go on a hiking trip with my group of friends from campus. Granted, the group that went was helmed by pretty serious and well-grounded people (haha..Isa, Darwis, Mus...)I had half-expected his jaw to drop when I told him that there were only 3 girls in the group of 10. Yet he did not even blink an eyelid. (Hey guys...that's how much he trusted you people!!!)
Anyway, it was nothing short of a great adventure. We decided that it would really be a trip on a shoestring budget. We would only spend $200 for a week ...and that would include the transportation costs. (Wow Abdullah...you'll make a great finance minister). ...and when I say shoestring..., it was really a belt-tightening affair.
Part I: The Night Mail Train
If you think the KTM rail services leave much to be desired, try taking the mail train...3rd class. Ya..for the life of me, I cannot understand why all the seats had to go against the flow of traffic, and that the seats were designed for aneroxics. It was 'naturally ventilated', and mind you, as we chugged through the various parts of Johor, our various odiferous encounters is something I will not likely forget.
I thought I would only see scenes of packed trains in movies of India or Indonesia...here...we had our fair share of people boarding with crates of live chickens, or laden with durians. Nasarruddin had people putting babies on to him twice, for apparently, we were the only ones with labelled seats. The Malaysians used the train like the way we use the bus.
Oh we were thoroughly 'entertained'. In the days of the pre-ipod-mp3 era, people actually carried the big radios. Never mind if it was past midnight, you'll never be able to sleep. And because our haversacks were neatly laid in a row, they were the 'seats' to those people who just needed to rest their behinds...(oh...we stopped at all 17 smaller stations along the slow winding route.
Part II. Termerloh Station (Pahang)
It was raining cats and dogs when we arrived at our station at about 5.00am. I guess we were so used to associating the word 'station' with a decent building where we could take shelter. We were already wet even before disembarking...for we could not close the windows of the carriage.
At 5.00am, in a rural area, let me tell you that the place can get so dark that you cannot even see your hand in front of you. Wet, tired and grouchy, we just wanted to be able to set foot on solid ground.
Temerloh Station was...er...a little wooden hut(?)no bigger than our bus stop. There was no sign of a station master, and no lights.
The rain felt like pallets pounding on us, and it was indeed an ominous sign. We were drowned rats...and in the darkness, we knew it was impossible to make the hike to the next checkpoint, the jetty.
But that was not the highlight of our arrival. When a flash of lightning struck, and the place was momentarily lit, we saw 'her!'...Hehehe...no, this is not a ghost story (at least not yet).
In the muddy, water-logged post, was this cow...about to deliver her calf...The smell of cow dung, wet mud and the slight of all that blood made the stomachs churn. How could we take shelter with the cow in there?
Mind you, if I was a movie director, I will try to recreate this classic scene. The full glory of thunder and lightning,..the torrential rain...and 10 young people undecided whether to move in or remain where they were. (oh...the banana trees had a nice effect...you know...banana trees=....cik pon...hehehehe)
Suddenly Isa screamed bloody murder...and that set off the whole group screaming incessantly. (Why were we all screaming like this?)I don't care if my faith forbids the touching of the other gender who are not my 'muhrim', but I must have clung on to one of the guys in terror.
We calmed down soon enough. Apparently, the one who had suddenly materialised before us was indeed the station master himself....He was also the owner of the cow.
Something was not quite right about the cow. It was making funny moaning sounds..., and when a streak of lightning lit the sky again, we saw a pair of hind legs coming out...
"Oh no...The calf is breeched.." That came from Az...yup, the final-year medical student(Dr Azhar now, mind you..hehehe). The cow tried to stand up, but fell back with a loud thump.
"Guys...we got to help...we need to turn the calf around."
Huh? What was Az saying? That he intended to play mid-wife in the middle of a god-forsaken place? He dropped his backpack and moved towards the creature. The station master followed, and soon he was joined by Isa and Darwis.
I think my respect (nd crush then?...hehehe) for Az went up more than a few notches. Dollah too, who was crooning (ya...singing softly) to the frightened cow while the rest ensured that it did not move.
Very calmly, Az pushed the little legs up the cervix (I think)...and physically manipulated the little calf in the womb in the best position for birthing.
Suddenly the rain and thunderstorm no longer mattered. We were soaked to the skin, and I guess, I did throw up once or twice watching the drama that was unfolding before our eyes. We were watching a miracle...
I think after more than half an hour or so, the head of the calf emerged. It slid out easily, on to the dirty floor...but the calf did not move. The cow was already up, and ready to move despite her ordeal.
I choked back a sob...Were our effort in vain?
Again, Az was quick-witted. He fished out the penknife he had carried, and methodogically, cut the thin layer of goo and grime of the afterbirth. And to our surprise, he bent down, and blew gently a few puffs. He was performing CPR on a that little creature.
If you asked me if I have witnessed any miracles, this would be one of them. There was a gurgling sound, and Az suddenly spat a lot of yucky mucus from his mouth. And believe you me, there was never a wonderous sight, when the little lifeless creature started to kick its legs. The eyes opened slowly, and it finally breathed on its on. (Sigh Az...you are a hero in my eyes)
Well...as you can see, I am very long-winded. That's all for today. Stay tuned for more adventures I had at Endau Rompin...that many, many years ago. (Ya Zafran, do you think that Mama is such a princess again who cannot take the challenges of camp?)
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
How Hungry Are You?
Today, I heard one of the most inspiring talks...given by a person whom I really feel is 'larger-than-life'. Dr William Tan came to speak to the students today, and reinforced the idea that "nothing is impossible - once you put your mind to it."
He was able to engaged the students with his anecdotes and stories peppered with a lot of advice and encouragement. He spoke about the challenges he takes on, driven by his passion and committment to the endeavour. Hey, I feel so humbled by his presence, for here was a living, breathing example of a special human being who has stretched beyond the limits of what most ordinary people can do.
I know I am gushing...but certain things do leave a lasting effect. But one phrase stood out...a phrase which was used by another person I know, who has really made it in life.
"How hungry are you?" - this is not physical hunger we are talking about. This is a hunger...for something that the heart, mind and soul seek for. Food is one of the most basic things we need in life...we need it to sustain us. If you have been hungry, you will know how your body reacts...how it craves and yearns for sustanance. You will do anything to appease your rumbling stomach.
On a higher level, it is the people who have experienced 'hunger' and now 'hungry' that somehow keeps pushing themselves on and on and on...Resilience, persistence, grit, courage, peserverence...for things that will 'satisfy' the hunger they seek. The hungrier they are...the more focused they will be on their goals. They will not give up until the appetite is satiated.
If you want something so badly...if you really want to achieve something in life...you need to feel the hunger for it. You should be able to stretch yourself ..even beyond the max...you will find yourself being able to break away from the glass ceiling that you set. And if you fall, you keep picking yourself up; brush away the dirt...and yes, try and try again until you really get it.
Yes, I concede...it is not easy to keep the mind positive all the time; especially in the face of challenges and obstacles. But when I look at the wheel-chair bound Dr Tan, I feel so small and humbled. I am able-bodied, and I have yet to achieve even 1/4 of the things he has done. No...make that 1/10. I must not allow failures, criticisms, or negative feedback to weigh me down..at least, not when things are really so important to me.
I need to really feel the hunger again. What do I want? How hungry am I?
So tell me...what are you hungry for? How hungry are you? If you can answer both...I'd say, go ahead, try it...you'll be able to surprise yourself.
[maybe...this is the time when I put aside my own self-doubts and insecurities. PhD anyone?]
He was able to engaged the students with his anecdotes and stories peppered with a lot of advice and encouragement. He spoke about the challenges he takes on, driven by his passion and committment to the endeavour. Hey, I feel so humbled by his presence, for here was a living, breathing example of a special human being who has stretched beyond the limits of what most ordinary people can do.
I know I am gushing...but certain things do leave a lasting effect. But one phrase stood out...a phrase which was used by another person I know, who has really made it in life.
"How hungry are you?" - this is not physical hunger we are talking about. This is a hunger...for something that the heart, mind and soul seek for. Food is one of the most basic things we need in life...we need it to sustain us. If you have been hungry, you will know how your body reacts...how it craves and yearns for sustanance. You will do anything to appease your rumbling stomach.
On a higher level, it is the people who have experienced 'hunger' and now 'hungry' that somehow keeps pushing themselves on and on and on...Resilience, persistence, grit, courage, peserverence...for things that will 'satisfy' the hunger they seek. The hungrier they are...the more focused they will be on their goals. They will not give up until the appetite is satiated.
If you want something so badly...if you really want to achieve something in life...you need to feel the hunger for it. You should be able to stretch yourself ..even beyond the max...you will find yourself being able to break away from the glass ceiling that you set. And if you fall, you keep picking yourself up; brush away the dirt...and yes, try and try again until you really get it.
Yes, I concede...it is not easy to keep the mind positive all the time; especially in the face of challenges and obstacles. But when I look at the wheel-chair bound Dr Tan, I feel so small and humbled. I am able-bodied, and I have yet to achieve even 1/4 of the things he has done. No...make that 1/10. I must not allow failures, criticisms, or negative feedback to weigh me down..at least, not when things are really so important to me.
I need to really feel the hunger again. What do I want? How hungry am I?
So tell me...what are you hungry for? How hungry are you? If you can answer both...I'd say, go ahead, try it...you'll be able to surprise yourself.
[maybe...this is the time when I put aside my own self-doubts and insecurities. PhD anyone?]
Sunday, May 11, 2008
How much is your Mama worth?
Today's entry...a copy of the stuff I wrote in the friendster one...
This is written in response to the newspaper article in the ST yesterday , "Mum, you could be paid $23K a month." In the spirit of Mother's Day, the paper decided to ask a HR expert the economic worth of a person called Mother.
Wow...A stay-home mother is worth $23K per month? (and that does not include bonus and PB?) Well, theoretically, this is true. But that is the higher end of the estimate. A more realistic figure would be around $8.5K monthly. But still...that is still a lot more than what I currently earn...(yaya...it's not that much no matter what you think)
The women ST interviewed were basically amused by this piece of info. "Not all mothers cook or teach their children daily.."..Sad but true. Yet all conceded that you cannot tag a price to the things a mother does.
As I read that, I am reminded of an incident that happened lately between my kids and I, and my actions, I must add, was motivated by a song I love and remember while I was growing up.
Sometimes, I do not have loose change in my wallet. (Ya...the days of electronic payment...and e-bay do not necessitate the carrying around of cash). So I 'borrow' from my kids when the need arises...And the kids too, to teach them the value of money, have been 'working' on special chores to earn some extra pocket money for their little luxuries they want. Unfortunately, I am a 'bad employer', and tend to accumulate some IOUs recently.
So one, who wanted to purchase something, approached me with an invoice. "Here Mama...I think you owe me this."
Here are the items:
1. Sharpino's Pizza treat :$50.00
2. Ironing @$10 per hr :$30.00
3. Newspaper money :$80.00
4. Special Errands :$30.00
5. Ben & Jerry's :$20.35
Total :$160.35
I knew that he was earnest. The money was needed as he wanted to go out with his friends. But I couldn't resist teasing him. I looked at the slip of paper, and the words of the song came flooding through my mind.
So I took the paper...and wrote these down.
Invoice for Z:
1. 9 months of carrying you(I cannot see my toes) : $ FOC
2. Nights I stayed up when you were sick : $ FOC
3. Your food, your toys, your clothes... : $ FOC
4. Hours of raising you :$ FOC
5. Special consultation & advice : $ FOC
Total cost of being your mother who loves you : No charge.
I placed this slip of paper, together with the money I owed him. I just wanted to see his reactions when he read that.
Just any other teen, he grabbed hold of the money, and left in a hurry. I left it as that. But later came this sms.
This was was it said.
"I am really broke, and have used the money I thought you owed me . But I read your note after I had fun with my friends.. But here is something for you. For all future bills...PAID IN FULL."
Hehehe...my heart is gratified. Of course if I borrow from him, I will return in kind. But this little thoughtfulness on his part, I love even more.
So let me remind you that you cannot really put a dollar value on love...whether is it a mother's , father's , or even a child. It is not about dollars and cents, it is not something that you give, and expect something in return.
To those of you who are really lucky to have such loving mothers, cherish them...not just on Mother's Day...it should be all the time. They may not be the easiest people to please at times, they may not be 'understanding all the time', but the fact that they gave birth to you should already be enough for you to remember not to hurt her..with your actions..with your unintentional words.
Thank you , God, for I am blessed. Keep my mum in good health always and let her be my inspiration.And in the same light, give me the courage, and wisdom, to be 'ibu mithali' to my loved ones, and those whom I have learnt to call my own.
Make each and every day, a mother's day.
{Sorry if I sound so mushy & soppy - a sentimental soul at heart lah)
This is written in response to the newspaper article in the ST yesterday , "Mum, you could be paid $23K a month." In the spirit of Mother's Day, the paper decided to ask a HR expert the economic worth of a person called Mother.
Wow...A stay-home mother is worth $23K per month? (and that does not include bonus and PB?) Well, theoretically, this is true. But that is the higher end of the estimate. A more realistic figure would be around $8.5K monthly. But still...that is still a lot more than what I currently earn...(yaya...it's not that much no matter what you think)
The women ST interviewed were basically amused by this piece of info. "Not all mothers cook or teach their children daily.."..Sad but true. Yet all conceded that you cannot tag a price to the things a mother does.
As I read that, I am reminded of an incident that happened lately between my kids and I, and my actions, I must add, was motivated by a song I love and remember while I was growing up.
Sometimes, I do not have loose change in my wallet. (Ya...the days of electronic payment...and e-bay do not necessitate the carrying around of cash). So I 'borrow' from my kids when the need arises...And the kids too, to teach them the value of money, have been 'working' on special chores to earn some extra pocket money for their little luxuries they want. Unfortunately, I am a 'bad employer', and tend to accumulate some IOUs recently.
So one, who wanted to purchase something, approached me with an invoice. "Here Mama...I think you owe me this."
Here are the items:
1. Sharpino's Pizza treat :$50.00
2. Ironing @$10 per hr :$30.00
3. Newspaper money :$80.00
4. Special Errands :$30.00
5. Ben & Jerry's :$20.35
Total :$160.35
I knew that he was earnest. The money was needed as he wanted to go out with his friends. But I couldn't resist teasing him. I looked at the slip of paper, and the words of the song came flooding through my mind.
So I took the paper...and wrote these down.
Invoice for Z:
1. 9 months of carrying you(I cannot see my toes) : $ FOC
2. Nights I stayed up when you were sick : $ FOC
3. Your food, your toys, your clothes... : $ FOC
4. Hours of raising you :$ FOC
5. Special consultation & advice : $ FOC
Total cost of being your mother who loves you : No charge.
I placed this slip of paper, together with the money I owed him. I just wanted to see his reactions when he read that.
Just any other teen, he grabbed hold of the money, and left in a hurry. I left it as that. But later came this sms.
This was was it said.
"I am really broke, and have used the money I thought you owed me . But I read your note after I had fun with my friends.. But here is something for you. For all future bills...PAID IN FULL."
Hehehe...my heart is gratified. Of course if I borrow from him, I will return in kind. But this little thoughtfulness on his part, I love even more.
So let me remind you that you cannot really put a dollar value on love...whether is it a mother's , father's , or even a child. It is not about dollars and cents, it is not something that you give, and expect something in return.
To those of you who are really lucky to have such loving mothers, cherish them...not just on Mother's Day...it should be all the time. They may not be the easiest people to please at times, they may not be 'understanding all the time', but the fact that they gave birth to you should already be enough for you to remember not to hurt her..with your actions..with your unintentional words.
Thank you , God, for I am blessed. Keep my mum in good health always and let her be my inspiration.And in the same light, give me the courage, and wisdom, to be 'ibu mithali' to my loved ones, and those whom I have learnt to call my own.
Make each and every day, a mother's day.
{Sorry if I sound so mushy & soppy - a sentimental soul at heart lah)
Failing does not make me a Failure
Sorry...today my brain is lagging. So another one of my old ramblings that I've recycled.
I found another one of Maxwell's books - "Failing Forward". It is another one of those motivational books and this time, how to turn mistakes into stepping stones for success. Again, the attraction of his books is that he put things across very simply, and yet, if you really think about it, it's pretty deep stuff. I like the part about "Rules for Being Human". As long as you are human, you are bound to make mistakes.
Rule
#1: You will learn lessons [whether you like it or not. Experience can either be a good or bad teacher. It's what you take away that counts.]
#2: There are no mistakes - only lessons ( you keep making 'mistakes because you got nothing from #1)That will depend on how much you want to learn. If ego stands in the way, sigh...
#3: A lesson is repeated until it is learned. ( In the school of hard knocks, students pick this up as it is faster)
#4: If you don't learn the easy lessons, they get harder (pain is the best teacher huh? Why do we tend to shortchange ourselves?)
#5: The moment your actions change, you know you have learned a lesson. (if not you will go back to #3).
Come to think of it, no one can actually graduate from the school from hard knocks. It is a life long compulsory education for everyone. We humans seem to have very short memories...(hehehe...why do some women have many kids even though the labour pains are horrendous? Oppps...that's not a mistake)
But the way you react in this school of experience determines whether you pass or fail the various tests you go through in life. And if you learn your lesson well, you will be able to stand firm in the face of many adversities that come your way.You will not be likely to throw in the towel so easily.
Does failing make you a failure?
All humans are flawed, and we make mistakes. No one is infalliable. No one is perfect. You know that there is absolutely no one is this world who is flawless. So you know that you will make mistakes -both big and small ones. So by right, there is no one in this world who has the right to call another person a 'FAILURE' !
Granted...we cannot be good at everything. Before we excel, we must fail a few times...it's like children who will fall many, many times before they learn to walk and run.
Take a lesson from the young ones...they will pick themselves up over and over again beause they DO NOT FEAR TO FAIL. (it is the parents who actually instil the fear in them when they become too protective, or when they fall and hurt themselves very badly...they'll stop for a while)
I like this saying from the book..."Don't cry over spilt milk...it really doesn't matter how much milk you spill as long as you don't lose your cows."...In our society, which is so geared towards excellence and perfection, have we learned to prepared ourselves for failing?
Sadly, nothing much have been done to help people to learn how to fall the right way. Society itself has been too critical and too quick to judge. And if the person who makes that mistake also perceives that way, then he will be a failure. The danger is that this stigma can be carried for life.
If your mind is set to 'failure' as its default mode, you will always never be satisfied in life. Do not allow yourself to do this each time you 'fail' to get something done right...whether it is exams results, a relationship that did not work, differences in opinions with parents, criticism from people higher up...and many more. It is usually the action that failed, not the character. Don't let your sense of self-worth be devalued.
Well...that's my two cents worth for today. It's back to telling myself about choice, responsibility and attitude. If I do something wrong, I will search for the reason with my own self first. I will take responsibility for the actions I have done. I learn, and I will improve.
I found another one of Maxwell's books - "Failing Forward". It is another one of those motivational books and this time, how to turn mistakes into stepping stones for success. Again, the attraction of his books is that he put things across very simply, and yet, if you really think about it, it's pretty deep stuff. I like the part about "Rules for Being Human". As long as you are human, you are bound to make mistakes.
Rule
#1: You will learn lessons [whether you like it or not. Experience can either be a good or bad teacher. It's what you take away that counts.]
#2: There are no mistakes - only lessons ( you keep making 'mistakes because you got nothing from #1)That will depend on how much you want to learn. If ego stands in the way, sigh...
#3: A lesson is repeated until it is learned. ( In the school of hard knocks, students pick this up as it is faster)
#4: If you don't learn the easy lessons, they get harder (pain is the best teacher huh? Why do we tend to shortchange ourselves?)
#5: The moment your actions change, you know you have learned a lesson. (if not you will go back to #3).
Come to think of it, no one can actually graduate from the school from hard knocks. It is a life long compulsory education for everyone. We humans seem to have very short memories...(hehehe...why do some women have many kids even though the labour pains are horrendous? Oppps...that's not a mistake)
But the way you react in this school of experience determines whether you pass or fail the various tests you go through in life. And if you learn your lesson well, you will be able to stand firm in the face of many adversities that come your way.You will not be likely to throw in the towel so easily.
Does failing make you a failure?
All humans are flawed, and we make mistakes. No one is infalliable. No one is perfect. You know that there is absolutely no one is this world who is flawless. So you know that you will make mistakes -both big and small ones. So by right, there is no one in this world who has the right to call another person a 'FAILURE' !
Granted...we cannot be good at everything. Before we excel, we must fail a few times...it's like children who will fall many, many times before they learn to walk and run.
Take a lesson from the young ones...they will pick themselves up over and over again beause they DO NOT FEAR TO FAIL. (it is the parents who actually instil the fear in them when they become too protective, or when they fall and hurt themselves very badly...they'll stop for a while)
I like this saying from the book..."Don't cry over spilt milk...it really doesn't matter how much milk you spill as long as you don't lose your cows."...In our society, which is so geared towards excellence and perfection, have we learned to prepared ourselves for failing?
Sadly, nothing much have been done to help people to learn how to fall the right way. Society itself has been too critical and too quick to judge. And if the person who makes that mistake also perceives that way, then he will be a failure. The danger is that this stigma can be carried for life.
If your mind is set to 'failure' as its default mode, you will always never be satisfied in life. Do not allow yourself to do this each time you 'fail' to get something done right...whether it is exams results, a relationship that did not work, differences in opinions with parents, criticism from people higher up...and many more. It is usually the action that failed, not the character. Don't let your sense of self-worth be devalued.
Well...that's my two cents worth for today. It's back to telling myself about choice, responsibility and attitude. If I do something wrong, I will search for the reason with my own self first. I will take responsibility for the actions I have done. I learn, and I will improve.
Saturday, May 10, 2008
Part III?
This is for F who said that I always leave the stories 'hanging'. That is called cliffhangers, dearie...
The spot where I sit is er...interesting..I know that my back is against the wall that seperates my room and the common toilet the other side. So you will hear all kinds of sounds through the wall. And though smell molecules do not travel through thick walls, I really wonder...and mind you, it is just 'there'...at my spot when certain 'smells' permeate.
I have learnt to bear with it. On days when it is not so pleasant, I will get the air-fresher out and spray the area. Or, when it gets cloyingly sweet, I just pack up and go home early. Really...like I've said, as long as I do not get disturbed.
The person who used to sit in the cubicle beside me was a heavy 'typer'. Very often he would work till late evening, typing away on his notebook. The people in my room are generally very quiet people. Once we get absorbed in what we do, we will not speak to each other. But before we go home, we will at least say goodbye to whoever is left.
That evening, I was catching up with my work. Most of the group had left. But I was glad that I still had company. Because of the cupboards, I could not see my neighour. Tap...tap...tap...I heard him puching the keys loudly.
But the quietness got to me after a while. it was just...too silent for my liking. So I switched on the radio...and wondered why a hip radio station was playing an old song "Are You Lonesome Tonight?"
Tap...tap...tap...the keyboard got louder...and then came the scent. No...no...odour...no...sweet..no...
And slowly I felt very very very cold.
"Er...Mr R...do you smell something?" I asked aloud. The tapping stopped. "No..." came back the husky growl... Strange...he sounded as if he had a sore throat.
I sat back to work. The smell was rather damp. I moved to the empty table in front. There was no funny smell whatsoever...
"Er..Mr R...you working late? Wait for me ok?...I need to finish this today." I asked.
"Hmmmm" came the growl again. Wah...he must not be in a good mood. Tap...Tap...Tap.
Then a burst of 'energy bounced into the room. Ms Shahnaz (some of you may remember her). "Hi...you are still here? I got to see Mr R. Is he still around?" she asked.
"Ya...go around...he's still there.." I told her.
She went to the next aisle.
"No...he's not there...There's no one here..."
I gulped. What the *toot*
Shahnaz came back to my side and eyed me curiously. I pulled her to my table area.
"Do you smell something?" I asked... She wrinkled her nose and cringed. I knew that the smell was back...and it got stronger. And suddenly, her eyes widened.
Tap...tap...tap..tap...someone was pounding on the keyboard again, quite distinctly over the other side of the cubicle.
I did not hesitate a moment longer. I grabbed hold of my bag, and pulled Shahnaz out of the room...and as I passed the big whiteboard in the general office, something caught my eye...there it was written..."Mr R....on MC today."
Oh...oh...oh...
The spot where I sit is er...interesting..I know that my back is against the wall that seperates my room and the common toilet the other side. So you will hear all kinds of sounds through the wall. And though smell molecules do not travel through thick walls, I really wonder...and mind you, it is just 'there'...at my spot when certain 'smells' permeate.
I have learnt to bear with it. On days when it is not so pleasant, I will get the air-fresher out and spray the area. Or, when it gets cloyingly sweet, I just pack up and go home early. Really...like I've said, as long as I do not get disturbed.
The person who used to sit in the cubicle beside me was a heavy 'typer'. Very often he would work till late evening, typing away on his notebook. The people in my room are generally very quiet people. Once we get absorbed in what we do, we will not speak to each other. But before we go home, we will at least say goodbye to whoever is left.
That evening, I was catching up with my work. Most of the group had left. But I was glad that I still had company. Because of the cupboards, I could not see my neighour. Tap...tap...tap...I heard him puching the keys loudly.
But the quietness got to me after a while. it was just...too silent for my liking. So I switched on the radio...and wondered why a hip radio station was playing an old song "Are You Lonesome Tonight?"
Tap...tap...tap...the keyboard got louder...and then came the scent. No...no...odour...no...sweet..no...
And slowly I felt very very very cold.
"Er...Mr R...do you smell something?" I asked aloud. The tapping stopped. "No..." came back the husky growl... Strange...he sounded as if he had a sore throat.
I sat back to work. The smell was rather damp. I moved to the empty table in front. There was no funny smell whatsoever...
"Er..Mr R...you working late? Wait for me ok?...I need to finish this today." I asked.
"Hmmmm" came the growl again. Wah...he must not be in a good mood. Tap...Tap...Tap.
Then a burst of 'energy bounced into the room. Ms Shahnaz (some of you may remember her). "Hi...you are still here? I got to see Mr R. Is he still around?" she asked.
"Ya...go around...he's still there.." I told her.
She went to the next aisle.
"No...he's not there...There's no one here..."
I gulped. What the *toot*
Shahnaz came back to my side and eyed me curiously. I pulled her to my table area.
"Do you smell something?" I asked... She wrinkled her nose and cringed. I knew that the smell was back...and it got stronger. And suddenly, her eyes widened.
Tap...tap...tap..tap...someone was pounding on the keyboard again, quite distinctly over the other side of the cubicle.
I did not hesitate a moment longer. I grabbed hold of my bag, and pulled Shahnaz out of the room...and as I passed the big whiteboard in the general office, something caught my eye...there it was written..."Mr R....on MC today."
Oh...oh...oh...
Friday, May 9, 2008
Anthology of CCSS encounters of the unexplained
Ok...ok...this is for those of you who have been asking when will part II be written. I am just glad that you enjoyed reading Part I...but puhlez..this is for your consumption, and not to be spread around and made into some kind of urban legend ok?
I must remind you of my stand about the existence of other 'beings'. Yes, I think they exist, but they will not be out to purposely disturb you...unless you disturb you first.
My friends who have been in the school at since we moved would definitely agree on one thing...between the old grounds and the current one...stranger things have taken place at the present site...hehehe..go figure.
The unexplained one came in the form of an experience shared by a colleague. She had wanted some quiet time to complete her work, and thus had gone to one of the special rooms to have her stack of papers printed. It was very..very...very quiet in the room, and so she had felt very uncomfortable. She was feeling rather stifled, even though the aircon was on at a cool temperature. So putting her large stack of papers in the printer drawer, she went out of the room to take a look at the view outside.
From behind the door, she could hear the hum of the printer working. She mentally calculated the number that was being printed, and when she thought the printing was done, she went into the room. She stopped short for a while when she came in. The lights in the lab had been switched off...she was sure she had left them on. Cautiously, she moved towards the printer...and she looked at it in amazement.
Where were her printed papers? The machine was cold to the touch. Not a single paper had come out from the feed. She pulled out her drawer...and realised that there was not a single sheet of paper in there! Her stack of papers never existed!
I wish that that was the end of her encounter. Confused and upset, she went out. She banged into her friend who asked if she was ok. She did not really answer him for she was shaken...He went into the room, and she did not even bother to tell him what had happened.
So imagine her horror when she walked into the common room...and saw HIM! He sat at the desk opposite her. Upon seeing her white, ashen face, he asked her if she was ok.(ya...talk about deja vu.)
"Didn't...did I..did I not just see you going to the lab just now?" she asked thinking that she must have really been dreaming.
"No...I have been here for the past one hour, doing my work." came his reply.
Thank goodness it was about 5 in the evening, and most of the others had gone home. Otherwise, they would have heard her shrieks of fear. So a group of brave souls decided to check her story...and went to the other room.
Lo and behold, when they went in, there, all over the floor, were the sheets of paper she had frantically searched for earlier...and of course, no sight of the 'double' she had bumped into earlier...!!!
Spooky? Hehehe...that is just part II...there's definitely more to come...especially of the 'fella' who 'keeps me company' at certain times of the year. So stay tuned.
I must remind you of my stand about the existence of other 'beings'. Yes, I think they exist, but they will not be out to purposely disturb you...unless you disturb you first.
My friends who have been in the school at since we moved would definitely agree on one thing...between the old grounds and the current one...stranger things have taken place at the present site...hehehe..go figure.
The unexplained one came in the form of an experience shared by a colleague. She had wanted some quiet time to complete her work, and thus had gone to one of the special rooms to have her stack of papers printed. It was very..very...very quiet in the room, and so she had felt very uncomfortable. She was feeling rather stifled, even though the aircon was on at a cool temperature. So putting her large stack of papers in the printer drawer, she went out of the room to take a look at the view outside.
From behind the door, she could hear the hum of the printer working. She mentally calculated the number that was being printed, and when she thought the printing was done, she went into the room. She stopped short for a while when she came in. The lights in the lab had been switched off...she was sure she had left them on. Cautiously, she moved towards the printer...and she looked at it in amazement.
Where were her printed papers? The machine was cold to the touch. Not a single paper had come out from the feed. She pulled out her drawer...and realised that there was not a single sheet of paper in there! Her stack of papers never existed!
I wish that that was the end of her encounter. Confused and upset, she went out. She banged into her friend who asked if she was ok. She did not really answer him for she was shaken...He went into the room, and she did not even bother to tell him what had happened.
So imagine her horror when she walked into the common room...and saw HIM! He sat at the desk opposite her. Upon seeing her white, ashen face, he asked her if she was ok.(ya...talk about deja vu.)
"Didn't...did I..did I not just see you going to the lab just now?" she asked thinking that she must have really been dreaming.
"No...I have been here for the past one hour, doing my work." came his reply.
Thank goodness it was about 5 in the evening, and most of the others had gone home. Otherwise, they would have heard her shrieks of fear. So a group of brave souls decided to check her story...and went to the other room.
Lo and behold, when they went in, there, all over the floor, were the sheets of paper she had frantically searched for earlier...and of course, no sight of the 'double' she had bumped into earlier...!!!
Spooky? Hehehe...that is just part II...there's definitely more to come...especially of the 'fella' who 'keeps me company' at certain times of the year. So stay tuned.
Thursday, May 8, 2008
Several Ways to Ruin A Child
Actually, this is from one of my older entries...but something which I still find relevant.
I finally found the piece of writing that I had been meaning to talk about in my blog. Some sharp wit has captured the very essence as to why we are facing so much problems with today's generation.
HOW TO RUIN YOUR CHILD
1. Begin from infancy to give your child everything he wants. This way he will grow up to think that the world owes him a living. [I guess that explains when asked to erase the whiteboard, the child turns and asks the teacher, "How much will you pay me?"
2. When he picks up bad words, laugh at him. It will encourage him to pick up cuter phrases that will blow the top off his head later. [mind you, the same thing happens when a 'cute kid' learns to answer back, and parents merely laugh...]
3. Never give him any spiritual training. Wait until he is 21 and let him decide for himself.[do you think they'll pick up good values from the internet?!!puhlez]
4. Avoid the use of the word “wrong.” It may develop a guilt complex. This will condition him later, when he is arrested for stealing a car, that society is against him and he is being persecuted. {ya...poor, poor Ah Boy...you took someone's things because mummy forgot to buy it for you...Don't you people see how traumatised he is?]
5. Pick up anything he leaves lying around, books, shoes, clothing, and whatever. Do everything for him so he will be experienced in throwing the responsibility onto others. [oh..no wait...it's not your job either...It's the Maid's!!!]
6. Let him read any printed matter he can get his hands on. Be careful that the drinking glasses and silverware are sterilized and that your house is nice but let his mind feed on garbage.[er...karma sutra is a piece of literary work, you know... My boi-boi stays up late in front of the pc each night so that he can do research...}
7. Quarrel frequently in the presence of children, then they won’t be too shocked when the home is broken up. [scream, shout, and hurl insults as well...to show them that adults are just as childish as them]
8. Give the child all the spending money he wants. Never let him earn his own. Why should he have things as tough as you had them. [$$$$ = Love ?]
9. Satisfy his every craving for food, drink and comfort. See that every desire is gratified. Denial may later lead to harmful frustrations. [absolutely nothing but the very best money can buy...never mind...fat-fat..cute-cute]
10. Take his part against the neighbors, the teachers, the policemen and the preacher. They are prejudiced against your baby. [ya..the teachers is just a 'better-paid babysitter. how dare they say that my baby is so naughty outside...]
11. When he gets into real trouble, apologize for yourself by saying, “I never could do anything with him anyway.”[and start pointing fingers at everyone...from the maid to the teacher to the bus driver...and the neighbour and the kid next door and....]
12. Prepare for a life of grief. You’re in for it. [You reap what you sow].
Of course my comments are made tongue in cheek. And somehow, I think I have written something like this before...but I think there is no harm remembering what can happen when parents do not realise that their overprotectiveness and overindulgence can bring more harm than good.
Today, I learnt to hold my tongue ...as I try to put myself in the position of my students. Why are some of them behaving in some wild, outrageous and challenging ways?
- because they were never really taught the correct way to behave
- because they have lost hope in themselves and the adults around them
-because they are so vulnerable that the best way to protect themselves is like the procupine...hurt others before others hurt you.
I am not the best parent in the world...and is not like to be the best...but I learn from my mistakes...and will try my best not to ruin my children.
I finally found the piece of writing that I had been meaning to talk about in my blog. Some sharp wit has captured the very essence as to why we are facing so much problems with today's generation.
HOW TO RUIN YOUR CHILD
1. Begin from infancy to give your child everything he wants. This way he will grow up to think that the world owes him a living. [I guess that explains when asked to erase the whiteboard, the child turns and asks the teacher, "How much will you pay me?"
2. When he picks up bad words, laugh at him. It will encourage him to pick up cuter phrases that will blow the top off his head later. [mind you, the same thing happens when a 'cute kid' learns to answer back, and parents merely laugh...]
3. Never give him any spiritual training. Wait until he is 21 and let him decide for himself.[do you think they'll pick up good values from the internet?!!puhlez]
4. Avoid the use of the word “wrong.” It may develop a guilt complex. This will condition him later, when he is arrested for stealing a car, that society is against him and he is being persecuted. {ya...poor, poor Ah Boy...you took someone's things because mummy forgot to buy it for you...Don't you people see how traumatised he is?]
5. Pick up anything he leaves lying around, books, shoes, clothing, and whatever. Do everything for him so he will be experienced in throwing the responsibility onto others. [oh..no wait...it's not your job either...It's the Maid's!!!]
6. Let him read any printed matter he can get his hands on. Be careful that the drinking glasses and silverware are sterilized and that your house is nice but let his mind feed on garbage.[er...karma sutra is a piece of literary work, you know... My boi-boi stays up late in front of the pc each night so that he can do research...}
7. Quarrel frequently in the presence of children, then they won’t be too shocked when the home is broken up. [scream, shout, and hurl insults as well...to show them that adults are just as childish as them]
8. Give the child all the spending money he wants. Never let him earn his own. Why should he have things as tough as you had them. [$$$$ = Love ?]
9. Satisfy his every craving for food, drink and comfort. See that every desire is gratified. Denial may later lead to harmful frustrations. [absolutely nothing but the very best money can buy...never mind...fat-fat..cute-cute]
10. Take his part against the neighbors, the teachers, the policemen and the preacher. They are prejudiced against your baby. [ya..the teachers is just a 'better-paid babysitter. how dare they say that my baby is so naughty outside...]
11. When he gets into real trouble, apologize for yourself by saying, “I never could do anything with him anyway.”[and start pointing fingers at everyone...from the maid to the teacher to the bus driver...and the neighbour and the kid next door and....]
12. Prepare for a life of grief. You’re in for it. [You reap what you sow].
Of course my comments are made tongue in cheek. And somehow, I think I have written something like this before...but I think there is no harm remembering what can happen when parents do not realise that their overprotectiveness and overindulgence can bring more harm than good.
Today, I learnt to hold my tongue ...as I try to put myself in the position of my students. Why are some of them behaving in some wild, outrageous and challenging ways?
- because they were never really taught the correct way to behave
- because they have lost hope in themselves and the adults around them
-because they are so vulnerable that the best way to protect themselves is like the procupine...hurt others before others hurt you.
I am not the best parent in the world...and is not like to be the best...but I learn from my mistakes...and will try my best not to ruin my children.
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
10 Myths Teenagers Believe about their Parents
I came across this article which I thought I would share with you. It's from Jay McGraw's book "Closing the Gap: A Strategy for Bringing Parents and Teens Together."
Call it the generation gap, or whatever, but I think we all agree that at one point of our lives, parents and teenagers seem to be talking to each other in very different languages.
Here are the (mis)perception of Teenagers of their parents.(the comments in italics are completely my perspective as a harried parent)
1. My parents do not want me to have any fun.
sigh...no matter how fuddy-duddy and strait-laced we are, we prefer RISK-FREE fun. I think I could enjoy the things that you enjoy too...but remember, I carried you for nine months...so please spare me the heart attacks ok. God gave you a body without blemishes...so no need to embellish with the latest body-piercings in any place puhlez....
2. My parents only care about what I do for them.
Hello...responsibility is not a dirty word,ok? You are getting older, smarter (and sassier). So for the last time...clean up your room...and remember, the laundry basket is there for a purpose. I do not want to find fermented underclothings under the bed.
3. My parents have no idea of what it is like to be a teenager.
Is it really so hard to believe that we were really young once? To want to be part of the 'in' crowd, and to be cool and hip? To experience crushes and angst? Really, ...been there, done that..and that is why we want to protect you from some of the heartaches. By the way, who was the wise-guy who reminded me "Mama...er..can you please act your age...when I decided to have a nostalgic jam & hop session at home?"
4. My parents control my life.
Hmmm...the only control I have is maybe the remote to the TV. But I think I have put enough sense in you to understand that you will soon make the important decisions that will guide your life. Why do you think I keep throwing back your questions to you. "Mama,what time must I be home tonight?"...My standard reply will always be..."Tell me what time I should be expecting you home..."
5. My parents do not want me to grow up.
Hehehe...remember this...no matter how old you are, you are still my baby!!! Your age justifies the white hair I have on my head, but do realise that if you act according to your age, I will reciprocate in return. Yes, no are no longer a little child, but as long as you are under 21, I am responsible for you...call it 'tough love' if you want. (plus...why are you all still in my bedroom on weekends?)
6. My parents will never change.
For this, I will always look into the mirror and sigh at the wrinkles and crow's feet, and the stretch marks and....I think I have changed as much as you have changed. We grow up together, and you have shaped my life as much as I have shaped yours. Perhaps, what will never change are my values, and the fact that I love you so, so, so very much, and will always want the best for you.
7. My parents never forget my screw-ups.
Sweetheart, we all screw-up, most of the time. I admit, the alarm bell rings each time you make a boo-boo...for I think, as a parent, I tend to react first, and rationalise later....or maybe, I see so much of me in you that I don't want you to make the mistakes that I did. You know that for every action, there is a consequence...and that it takes a real man/woman to stand up and admit his folly. Learn from mistakes (and puhlez...just make sure you don't keep repeating the same one)
8. My parents do not respect my opinions.
If the conversation consists of 'whatever'...'this sucks'..then of course you know you had it coming. Hehehe...please remember...I always teach the kids in school the importance of OEEC. Each opinion must be explained,elaborated and then justified with evidence and examples. So I should be hearing things like, "Mama...I do not like the new shirt you got me (O). The colour and style do not suit me (E). The last time I wore something like this, was way back in kindergarten (E)...But thank you for being so considerate and loving , and supplying my wardrobe all these years. (C).Hehehehe...
9. My parents think they know everything.
I really believe that wisdom comes from age and experience. But you know me better, right? What I don't know...I will definitely find out (yayaya...Mama can out-google you anytime). But honestly, I do not have the answers all the time, and sometimes, it is hard for me to admit it is so. I will admit that you are right, as long as your sense of respect is not replaced by a profound glee of one-upmanship.
10. My parents...love me?!!
Ok...ok...I admit that most parents do not say this enough, and perhaps their actions are not enough to convince the teenager of this love. Answer me this...why do most teens cringe when their parents hug them openly? But to my 3 loves...you know what each and every one of you mean to me...and that when I scold you, I am chiding the action done, and it does not mean that I love you any less. Love does not translate also to the kinds of gifts you get...for I need not show my affection in that way.
I pray that I am there when you are in trouble
I pray that I am able to pick you up when your life is in shambles.
I am there to share your laughter and your tears...to make things right when they go wrong...so that you will grow bright and strong.
To all the teens out there, please believe that your parents do, and always will, love you. It is just that sometimes, they forget...
Don't let the myths mislead you...
Call it the generation gap, or whatever, but I think we all agree that at one point of our lives, parents and teenagers seem to be talking to each other in very different languages.
Here are the (mis)perception of Teenagers of their parents.(the comments in italics are completely my perspective as a harried parent)
1. My parents do not want me to have any fun.
sigh...no matter how fuddy-duddy and strait-laced we are, we prefer RISK-FREE fun. I think I could enjoy the things that you enjoy too...but remember, I carried you for nine months...so please spare me the heart attacks ok. God gave you a body without blemishes...so no need to embellish with the latest body-piercings in any place puhlez....
2. My parents only care about what I do for them.
Hello...responsibility is not a dirty word,ok? You are getting older, smarter (and sassier). So for the last time...clean up your room...and remember, the laundry basket is there for a purpose. I do not want to find fermented underclothings under the bed.
3. My parents have no idea of what it is like to be a teenager.
Is it really so hard to believe that we were really young once? To want to be part of the 'in' crowd, and to be cool and hip? To experience crushes and angst? Really, ...been there, done that..and that is why we want to protect you from some of the heartaches. By the way, who was the wise-guy who reminded me "Mama...er..can you please act your age...when I decided to have a nostalgic jam & hop session at home?"
4. My parents control my life.
Hmmm...the only control I have is maybe the remote to the TV. But I think I have put enough sense in you to understand that you will soon make the important decisions that will guide your life. Why do you think I keep throwing back your questions to you. "Mama,what time must I be home tonight?"...My standard reply will always be..."Tell me what time I should be expecting you home..."
5. My parents do not want me to grow up.
Hehehe...remember this...no matter how old you are, you are still my baby!!! Your age justifies the white hair I have on my head, but do realise that if you act according to your age, I will reciprocate in return. Yes, no are no longer a little child, but as long as you are under 21, I am responsible for you...call it 'tough love' if you want. (plus...why are you all still in my bedroom on weekends?)
6. My parents will never change.
For this, I will always look into the mirror and sigh at the wrinkles and crow's feet, and the stretch marks and....I think I have changed as much as you have changed. We grow up together, and you have shaped my life as much as I have shaped yours. Perhaps, what will never change are my values, and the fact that I love you so, so, so very much, and will always want the best for you.
7. My parents never forget my screw-ups.
Sweetheart, we all screw-up, most of the time. I admit, the alarm bell rings each time you make a boo-boo...for I think, as a parent, I tend to react first, and rationalise later....or maybe, I see so much of me in you that I don't want you to make the mistakes that I did. You know that for every action, there is a consequence...and that it takes a real man/woman to stand up and admit his folly. Learn from mistakes (and puhlez...just make sure you don't keep repeating the same one)
8. My parents do not respect my opinions.
If the conversation consists of 'whatever'...'this sucks'..then of course you know you had it coming. Hehehe...please remember...I always teach the kids in school the importance of OEEC. Each opinion must be explained,elaborated and then justified with evidence and examples. So I should be hearing things like, "Mama...I do not like the new shirt you got me (O). The colour and style do not suit me (E). The last time I wore something like this, was way back in kindergarten (E)...But thank you for being so considerate and loving , and supplying my wardrobe all these years. (C).Hehehehe...
9. My parents think they know everything.
I really believe that wisdom comes from age and experience. But you know me better, right? What I don't know...I will definitely find out (yayaya...Mama can out-google you anytime). But honestly, I do not have the answers all the time, and sometimes, it is hard for me to admit it is so. I will admit that you are right, as long as your sense of respect is not replaced by a profound glee of one-upmanship.
10. My parents...love me?!!
Ok...ok...I admit that most parents do not say this enough, and perhaps their actions are not enough to convince the teenager of this love. Answer me this...why do most teens cringe when their parents hug them openly? But to my 3 loves...you know what each and every one of you mean to me...and that when I scold you, I am chiding the action done, and it does not mean that I love you any less. Love does not translate also to the kinds of gifts you get...for I need not show my affection in that way.
Actually, there is a real cause of worry if these 'myths' are actually realities that is played out in the lives of many young people today. And because of the lack of open communication, support, respect and love, the gulf between teens and parents will always be there.
To Zaf, Iffah & Akmal, (and all my many, many other kids)I pray that I am there when you are in trouble
I pray that I am able to pick you up when your life is in shambles.
I am there to share your laughter and your tears...to make things right when they go wrong...so that you will grow bright and strong.
To all the teens out there, please believe that your parents do, and always will, love you. It is just that sometimes, they forget...
Don't let the myths mislead you...
Tuesday, May 6, 2008
Grandma...10 years on
There is a saying that "it takes a village to raise a child". I think this applies to me quite literally. I know it may sound as if I had an unsettled childhood...but on the contrary, I had one of the most enriching upbringing ever.
Mak and Abah worked, and back then, it was quite rare for a Malay woman not to be a full-time housewife. And back in the pre-maid days, I guess I was 'thrown around' pretty much...fortunately, there were always someone around to 'catch'.
My mum had a whole army of every-ready babysitters and care-givers.(hehehe...maybe I was really such an adorable child). My earliest memories revolve around my Waks...a pool of my mum's elder sisters. Their houses were small and cramped, but I was always welcomed and loved. I remember how syiok it was to take a morning bath from the icy-cold well-water in a kampung in Bukit Panjang, or getting up early in the morning to 'chope' the first durian that fell from the tree in Mandai...or playing hide-n-seek under the stilted wooden houses and hiding in chicken coops in Kg Pasiran.
Those were the wonderful, carefree days I had frowing up with my cousins...climbing trees and attap roofs...looking for fighting spiders, and playing in drains...or the fun we had splashing in puddles in the rain...
Oh I had the 'luxuries' too...when I would be whisked away by Nek Tor and Cik Yam...for treats like milkshakes at Red House (an old ice-cream parlour), movies at Odean or trips to Van Kleef Aquarium...and I think I was really spoilt silly with the endless gifts I received...(hehehe..my head is indeed growing bigger...I must have been really, really,really lovable).
But it took Nenek ( my real grandma)to peg me down. Really, as someone who had lots and lots of grandchildren (35 in all), she really could not have favourites. So she treated all of us equally...strict and firm...and seldom did we get a chance to be 'manja' with her. But did it mean that she loved us any less?
The more I think of it, the more I understand the extent of her sacrifice and love for her family. I could not understand why I couldn't snuggle up to her, or get a cuddle when I wanted one for she was not outwardly affectionate. Like I said before, she was a formidable woman, and many a time, I had thought of her as being cold and tough.
But now I remember...
The time when I was down with chickenpox, and how she prepared daily for a week, a foul-smelling concoction which she would smear all over so that the marks will not turn to scars.
The time she stayed up at night with me when I ran a high fever, and she insisted on giving me baths several times to cool me down.
The 5 one cent coins she dug from her worn out purse when I had whined that I never got treats from her..."here...this is the only money I have left...buy the chocolate, and share with your cousins."
The pot of sambal ikan bilis she cooked when I came to visit on weekends...when I had grown much older.
I remember...I remember...
How Nenek was so reluctant to move out of her beloved shophouse, even though her children could support her....
And how...as she aged, she slowly 'lost her identity'...She came down with Alzheimer's Disease...a condition which took away her memories...bit by bit...
She forgot names of people...of places...of time and date...of events...she became like a broken-down tape recorder, and would repeat something she had just said 30 seconds before...It was a challenging time for a lot of people...for it was really trying to have an old lady telling people that she did not know where her children were...and why she was among strangers.
But...but..but...
She never forgot me...she remembered my name...though she could not realise that I had grown up , and had children of my own. She still gently scolded me for not being tidy...or some other thing,...or sometimes chided me for not 'feeding her'.
To the end...
Nenek never forgot me...and for that, I am so happy.
And because of that...I mustered all my courage, and helped out when the final cleansing ritual was done on her...with silent tears streaming down.
Nenek, till today, I will never be able to find someone who can cook the ikan bilis sambal the way you do...and ten years on...I still miss you.
[Al-fatihah for Hjh Jalehah binte Amin...1903 - 1998]
Mak and Abah worked, and back then, it was quite rare for a Malay woman not to be a full-time housewife. And back in the pre-maid days, I guess I was 'thrown around' pretty much...fortunately, there were always someone around to 'catch'.
My mum had a whole army of every-ready babysitters and care-givers.(hehehe...maybe I was really such an adorable child). My earliest memories revolve around my Waks...a pool of my mum's elder sisters. Their houses were small and cramped, but I was always welcomed and loved. I remember how syiok it was to take a morning bath from the icy-cold well-water in a kampung in Bukit Panjang, or getting up early in the morning to 'chope' the first durian that fell from the tree in Mandai...or playing hide-n-seek under the stilted wooden houses and hiding in chicken coops in Kg Pasiran.
Those were the wonderful, carefree days I had frowing up with my cousins...climbing trees and attap roofs...looking for fighting spiders, and playing in drains...or the fun we had splashing in puddles in the rain...
Oh I had the 'luxuries' too...when I would be whisked away by Nek Tor and Cik Yam...for treats like milkshakes at Red House (an old ice-cream parlour), movies at Odean or trips to Van Kleef Aquarium...and I think I was really spoilt silly with the endless gifts I received...(hehehe..my head is indeed growing bigger...I must have been really, really,really lovable).
But it took Nenek ( my real grandma)to peg me down. Really, as someone who had lots and lots of grandchildren (35 in all), she really could not have favourites. So she treated all of us equally...strict and firm...and seldom did we get a chance to be 'manja' with her. But did it mean that she loved us any less?
The more I think of it, the more I understand the extent of her sacrifice and love for her family. I could not understand why I couldn't snuggle up to her, or get a cuddle when I wanted one for she was not outwardly affectionate. Like I said before, she was a formidable woman, and many a time, I had thought of her as being cold and tough.
But now I remember...
The time when I was down with chickenpox, and how she prepared daily for a week, a foul-smelling concoction which she would smear all over so that the marks will not turn to scars.
The time she stayed up at night with me when I ran a high fever, and she insisted on giving me baths several times to cool me down.
The 5 one cent coins she dug from her worn out purse when I had whined that I never got treats from her..."here...this is the only money I have left...buy the chocolate, and share with your cousins."
The pot of sambal ikan bilis she cooked when I came to visit on weekends...when I had grown much older.
I remember...I remember...
How Nenek was so reluctant to move out of her beloved shophouse, even though her children could support her....
And how...as she aged, she slowly 'lost her identity'...She came down with Alzheimer's Disease...a condition which took away her memories...bit by bit...
She forgot names of people...of places...of time and date...of events...she became like a broken-down tape recorder, and would repeat something she had just said 30 seconds before...It was a challenging time for a lot of people...for it was really trying to have an old lady telling people that she did not know where her children were...and why she was among strangers.
But...but..but...
She never forgot me...she remembered my name...though she could not realise that I had grown up , and had children of my own. She still gently scolded me for not being tidy...or some other thing,...or sometimes chided me for not 'feeding her'.
To the end...
Nenek never forgot me...and for that, I am so happy.
And because of that...I mustered all my courage, and helped out when the final cleansing ritual was done on her...with silent tears streaming down.
Nenek, till today, I will never be able to find someone who can cook the ikan bilis sambal the way you do...and ten years on...I still miss you.
[Al-fatihah for Hjh Jalehah binte Amin...1903 - 1998]
Monday, May 5, 2008
The Compass Within
The idea of using the compass metaphor struck me when one of my teachers showed me the answer scripts she was marking. Mind you, we are not teaching the kids geography, but English. The kids were given a map of Australia, and even the signs that had 4 compass points, and all they had to do was to name the places as requested on the map. For example, what is the city furthest north found on the map...Alas, a large number was unable to do this. Even with the given compass points, they simply cannot find the intended destination.
Lets then think about the bigger picture...do we realise that within each of us, we have a compass that can actually lead us to where we want to go? We do have the bearings that can show us the way... But, how many of us really know how to use this tool effectively? Do you even know that it exists, and why have we not bothered to use it to our advantage when we find ourselves 'lost'?
2 basic things are crucial here.
First, self-awareness and being able to recognise what exactly is this compass within. Then to learn about its 'functions' as a navigating tool, and use it to our advantage.
Okay...we often hear expressions that 'life is a long, rough road', or 'you've got to travel many miles to reach your destination in life', and many others that describe life as a continuous journey. Well...where are we heading for in the first place? How do we get there? And how and when will we be able to say, "I have finally arrived!" ? Does reaching a destination really mean that you have truly 'arrived'?
I know that I am asking questions that I may not really be able to answer. Maybe the answer will come as I travel through my time here on Earth, but...what I do know is that, I can shape a purpose for my existence. Your hopes and your dreams are just pit stops you want to head to, milestones you want to reach at different points in your life. So you need to be able to steer your way to finding the most meaningful direction that would help you reach that destination.
How do we recognise the compass within? I think it is the values and principles that we uphold. That is why, those of you who are parents out there, your responsibility is great. The best gift you can bestow upon a child is the inculcation of good, sound moral values. Activate the strongest 'compass' within and set the bearings right. So that even in the most trying of times, a child will be able to find his way through, and remain intact. He will become a survivor because of the compass in him.
In the early years, the parents play the role of the 'navigator'. The child is under 'your wing' and help him through. Teach him about resilience, empathy, honesty, tolerance, determination, patience, understanding,...oh so many things. Equip him with life's skills that he can use through his existance.
Yes, you protect the child, but don't 'cripple' him that he doesn't know how to solve his own problems. You lead and guide the child well, cos their internal compass points to you as the direction they follow. Show them how to find their way through the most challenging of obstacles, how to weather the stormiest of seas, and pick themselves up when they fall...until they learn to navigate on their own.
For the rest of us, no matter at what stage of life we are at, do we have a good, working compass within? Have we been able to identify our destinations? What is your vision? Are you always moving towards that vision?
A lot of people tend to feel discontented, discouraged and dissatisfied because they have not really grabbed hold of a vision for themselves. A powerful vision guides you ...for that is a destination you want to reach...and you must want it so badly, that you will really do whatever it takes to get there, no matter how long it takes, no matter how hard it becomes.
Do remember the words of a wise man who said, " Happiness, wealth & success are by-products of goal-setting; they cannot be the goal themselves."
Remember what I keep on saying about Choices & Responsibilities? We all 'react' when we are in a difficult situation. Either we think and wish for 'the good old days', 'daydream about what might be' if things did not go right, get paralysed by our own fears and lack of self-belief, or choose to face the problem in the face, and transform it...choose to be make the best of whatever situation we are in.
I hope that today's entry will be meaning to some people. And this is also a way for me to reach out to my kids out there who are feeling 'lost' at the moment. Take stock of your compass...sometimes it is ok that we get derailed, or have veered off course... And if you fall, pick yourself up from the fall, tend to the 'wounds and injuries' ...rest if you need to...and then walk towards the right direction again...
All of you are destined for something great. It is up to you. Find the compass within, and you are set to find your way.
Lets then think about the bigger picture...do we realise that within each of us, we have a compass that can actually lead us to where we want to go? We do have the bearings that can show us the way... But, how many of us really know how to use this tool effectively? Do you even know that it exists, and why have we not bothered to use it to our advantage when we find ourselves 'lost'?
2 basic things are crucial here.
First, self-awareness and being able to recognise what exactly is this compass within. Then to learn about its 'functions' as a navigating tool, and use it to our advantage.
Okay...we often hear expressions that 'life is a long, rough road', or 'you've got to travel many miles to reach your destination in life', and many others that describe life as a continuous journey. Well...where are we heading for in the first place? How do we get there? And how and when will we be able to say, "I have finally arrived!" ? Does reaching a destination really mean that you have truly 'arrived'?
I know that I am asking questions that I may not really be able to answer. Maybe the answer will come as I travel through my time here on Earth, but...what I do know is that, I can shape a purpose for my existence. Your hopes and your dreams are just pit stops you want to head to, milestones you want to reach at different points in your life. So you need to be able to steer your way to finding the most meaningful direction that would help you reach that destination.
How do we recognise the compass within? I think it is the values and principles that we uphold. That is why, those of you who are parents out there, your responsibility is great. The best gift you can bestow upon a child is the inculcation of good, sound moral values. Activate the strongest 'compass' within and set the bearings right. So that even in the most trying of times, a child will be able to find his way through, and remain intact. He will become a survivor because of the compass in him.
In the early years, the parents play the role of the 'navigator'. The child is under 'your wing' and help him through. Teach him about resilience, empathy, honesty, tolerance, determination, patience, understanding,...oh so many things. Equip him with life's skills that he can use through his existance.
Yes, you protect the child, but don't 'cripple' him that he doesn't know how to solve his own problems. You lead and guide the child well, cos their internal compass points to you as the direction they follow. Show them how to find their way through the most challenging of obstacles, how to weather the stormiest of seas, and pick themselves up when they fall...until they learn to navigate on their own.
For the rest of us, no matter at what stage of life we are at, do we have a good, working compass within? Have we been able to identify our destinations? What is your vision? Are you always moving towards that vision?
A lot of people tend to feel discontented, discouraged and dissatisfied because they have not really grabbed hold of a vision for themselves. A powerful vision guides you ...for that is a destination you want to reach...and you must want it so badly, that you will really do whatever it takes to get there, no matter how long it takes, no matter how hard it becomes.
Do remember the words of a wise man who said, " Happiness, wealth & success are by-products of goal-setting; they cannot be the goal themselves."
Remember what I keep on saying about Choices & Responsibilities? We all 'react' when we are in a difficult situation. Either we think and wish for 'the good old days', 'daydream about what might be' if things did not go right, get paralysed by our own fears and lack of self-belief, or choose to face the problem in the face, and transform it...choose to be make the best of whatever situation we are in.
I hope that today's entry will be meaning to some people. And this is also a way for me to reach out to my kids out there who are feeling 'lost' at the moment. Take stock of your compass...sometimes it is ok that we get derailed, or have veered off course... And if you fall, pick yourself up from the fall, tend to the 'wounds and injuries' ...rest if you need to...and then walk towards the right direction again...
All of you are destined for something great. It is up to you. Find the compass within, and you are set to find your way.
Sunday, May 4, 2008
The Hardest Simple Rules to Live By
I can't remember where, when or how I learnt this...but I know it was passed down to me by a very wise lady. She said that life should not be too complicated...that the easiest thing to abide by are 3 Simple Rules...She is right, you know...the rules are simple.
But to live up to them can be very,very,very hard.
I begin each year, in each new class, with them; telling the kids in school that I would expect them to remember these 3 things...instead of the dos and don'ts. My own three children abide by them too.
3 Simple Rules
1. Look after yourself
2. Look after each other
3. Look after the larger community (and the world). Of course...for my purpose..it was changed to the school.
It seems very easy right ? I don't think so. And of the three, the hardest...is the very first rule.
Look After Your Self
On the surface, it seems as though it's asking you to be self-centred, selfish and even egoistic ...only thinking about your own needs and wants. But do not forget that before you can look after others, you need to be able to look after your SELF first.
How many of us really do that ? Be our own best friend ? Be our own critic too? To look after your SELF means so many things...
Do we tell our SELF to be good, and do good all the time? Do we pick our SELF when we are down? Do we develop in our SELF good moral values? Do we tell our SELF to keep on going when the odds are against us?
Looking after our SELF...means being responsible for the being in us...to ensure that our SELF has integrity. Think of integrity like the foundation of your house...If that foundation is strong,..it will be able to hold up against the strongest winds. To have that integrity, you need to look after your SELF...to ensure you stick to moral and ethical principles...and develop a sound character...and that is extremely hard...for we humans have flaws, and succumb to our desires, or our 'dark side'. It is ironic that this means being committed to looking after your CHARACTER than for personal gain or glory or gratification.
Looking after our SELF...I got this quote from a book,"Integrity is an inside job". You learn to love, respect, honour and care for your SELF(again a reminder that you are not to turn into a megalomaniac) You learn to be responsible to make the 'best' choices for yourself.. You will build a positive ATTITUDE for the SELF. Choose nothing but the best for yourself.
Looking after your SELF...means being dedicated to inculcating values like honesty, faith, trusthworthiness. In a time of constant change, you need to be firmly anchored by beliefs and principless that will not change. Be true to these virtues, and have faith in the One above.
When you are ready for the first rule, the rest will fall in place.
So what appears to be simple, is indeed the hardest? Really? Just be true to your SELF...and God willing, you'll be a much better being.
I choose to live by the rules...and if I slip occasionally, I will keep on trying.
But to live up to them can be very,very,very hard.
I begin each year, in each new class, with them; telling the kids in school that I would expect them to remember these 3 things...instead of the dos and don'ts. My own three children abide by them too.
3 Simple Rules
1. Look after yourself
2. Look after each other
3. Look after the larger community (and the world). Of course...for my purpose..it was changed to the school.
It seems very easy right ? I don't think so. And of the three, the hardest...is the very first rule.
Look After Your Self
On the surface, it seems as though it's asking you to be self-centred, selfish and even egoistic ...only thinking about your own needs and wants. But do not forget that before you can look after others, you need to be able to look after your SELF first.
How many of us really do that ? Be our own best friend ? Be our own critic too? To look after your SELF means so many things...
Do we tell our SELF to be good, and do good all the time? Do we pick our SELF when we are down? Do we develop in our SELF good moral values? Do we tell our SELF to keep on going when the odds are against us?
Looking after our SELF...means being responsible for the being in us...to ensure that our SELF has integrity. Think of integrity like the foundation of your house...If that foundation is strong,..it will be able to hold up against the strongest winds. To have that integrity, you need to look after your SELF...to ensure you stick to moral and ethical principles...and develop a sound character...and that is extremely hard...for we humans have flaws, and succumb to our desires, or our 'dark side'. It is ironic that this means being committed to looking after your CHARACTER than for personal gain or glory or gratification.
Looking after our SELF...I got this quote from a book,"Integrity is an inside job". You learn to love, respect, honour and care for your SELF(again a reminder that you are not to turn into a megalomaniac) You learn to be responsible to make the 'best' choices for yourself.. You will build a positive ATTITUDE for the SELF. Choose nothing but the best for yourself.
Looking after your SELF...means being dedicated to inculcating values like honesty, faith, trusthworthiness. In a time of constant change, you need to be firmly anchored by beliefs and principless that will not change. Be true to these virtues, and have faith in the One above.
When you are ready for the first rule, the rest will fall in place.
So what appears to be simple, is indeed the hardest? Really? Just be true to your SELF...and God willing, you'll be a much better being.
I choose to live by the rules...and if I slip occasionally, I will keep on trying.
Saturday, May 3, 2008
A Blue Ribbon for You
This is for those of you who 'complained' that the other blog is not that accessible. This is my first attempt to put my rambling thoughts here. Hopefuly, I will be able to archive the some of my earlier posts somewhere here.
This entry is a fairly short one...for the young people who think that no one cares...and to the older ones...who need a gentle reminder that no matter who you are, you make a difference.
We must not lose faith in the world...there is still a lot of goodness left. So do watch this, and try to understand.
http://www.makeadifference.com
So to all who read this, pass the blue ribbon I have 'pinned' on you to those who make a difference in yours.
Thank you for making that difference in mine.
This entry is a fairly short one...for the young people who think that no one cares...and to the older ones...who need a gentle reminder that no matter who you are, you make a difference.
We must not lose faith in the world...there is still a lot of goodness left. So do watch this, and try to understand.
http://www.makeadifference.com
So to all who read this, pass the blue ribbon I have 'pinned' on you to those who make a difference in yours.
Thank you for making that difference in mine.
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