The above title are lines taken from Harper Lee's famous novel,"To Kill a Mockingbird." In it, a father tells his child that despite whatever that will happen, and no matter how much you are taunted and provoked, and even though you think you are in the right, never let your allow your anger to get the better of you.
Anger is such a powerful force. It is also the easiest emotion to feel, and almost every single human being is capable of being angry. In school, I teach the kids a whole range of synonyms to describe this feeing...from the mild miff to a sense of outrage and being livid.
When I was young, I guess I was also once wilful and tempestuous. It seemed much easier to let the impulsive heart rule the head. I was angsty, moody , and there were days, when I was sure that the world was against me. Poor, misguided and misunderstood me once thought that I owed the world nothing. But I must qualify something...I was 'passive aggressive' ...meaning that like the dormant volcano, I would boil and simmer for so long until one day things blow up...and sometimes sadly, straight to my face.
In 'Merchant of Venice" Shylock was asked why he was so heartless and calculating. His reply?
"If you prick us, do we not bleed?/ If you tickle us, do we not laugh? If you/ poison us, do we not die? And if you wrong us, shall we not revenge?" - II.i.58.
The play highlights our prejudices and our stereotypes...and how quick we are to judge others. When people hurt and pick on us, one of the most immediate reaction is to blow up.
But many of us forget...when anger consumes us, and we lose self-control, we are the ones who may end up losers. Is it a real shame , or a loss of face, if we just stand our ground, and keep our cool.
I guess anger is so prominent because it masks our fears and pain...wounds that stem from insecurities, and weaknesses. We are so frightened by our own flaws that we need to exert ourselves...using the negative power to make us feel we are in control.
I believe...like everything else, I have that choice to make whether or not I want to let anger get the better of me. Over the years, I realise that for me...I have bottled up my anger, and that is why when I have my periodic outbursts, I feel so ashamed.
If I control my anger, does that make me come across a wimpy and ineffective? Will others respect me less? I don't know..
But at the moment, I will keep my fists down...and make sure that the head rules.
I am more contented to being Oscar the Grouch...at least he's lovable...hehehe
Thursday, April 16, 2009
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