Since the school has decided to adopt the CAR motto (Choices, Attitudes & Responsibilities), I am going to focus on that for the next few entries.
In this profession, my job is to teach, and pass on the knowledge to another person.
But what is important, is that I remain teachable....meaning that I must focus on wanting to learn myself.
I must be open to the fact that there are still a lot of things that I do not know, and that each opportunity may present to me as a learning experience.
These days, I know I can no longer expect the kids to be seated quietly and dutifully follow what I say. I am not the 'master', and it is not a 'monkey see, monkey do' situation. No matter how much knowledge I may think I have, I can learn from what happens around me.
Failure thus...is something necessary in life. Without failures, we don't learn . Some people may think of defeats and outcomes that are not positive as signs of shortcomings...that may be true, but one needs to step back and think.
Why have I failed?
Was it me, or circumstances beyond my control?
What can I change?
Can I find the courage to try again?
If you live to learn, then you will really learn to live.
Dear God,
Thank you for opening my eyes to what I have been blind to all these while.
Help me to continually learn, so that I can grow in Your Service
Ameen.
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
The Most Beautiful Flower
The park bench was deserted as I sat down to read
Beneath the long, straggly branches of an old willow tree.
Disillusioned by life with good reason to frown,
For the world was intent on dragging me down.
And if that weren't enough to ruin my day,
A young boy out of breath approached me, all tired from play.
He stood right before me with his head tilted down
And said with great excitement, "Look what I found!"
In his hand was a flower, and what a pitiful sight,
With its petals all worn -- not enough rain, or too little light.
Wanting him to take his dead flower and go off to play,
I faked a small smile and then shifted away.
But instead of retreating he sat next to my side
And placed the flower to his nose and declared with overacted surprise,
"It sure smells pretty and it's beautiful, too.
That's why I picked it; here, it's for you."
The weed before me was dying or dead.
Not vibrant of colors, orange, yellow or red.
But I knew I must take it, or he might never leave.
So I reached for the flower, and replied, "Just what I need."
But instead of him placing the flower in my hand,
He held it midair without reason or plan.
It was then that I noticed for the very first time
That weed-toting boy could not see: he was blind.
I heard my voice quiver, tears shone like the sun
As I thanked him for picking the very best one.
"You're welcome," he smiled, and then ran off to play,
Unaware of the impact he'd had on my day.
I sat there and wondered how he managed to see
A self-pitying woman beneath an old willow tree.
How did he know of my self-indulged plight?
Perhaps from his heart, he'd been blessed with true sight.
Through the eyes of a blind child, at last I could see
The problem was not with the world; the problem was me.
And for all of those times I myself had been blind,
I vowed to see the beauty in life, and appreciate every second that's mine.
And then I held that wilted flower up to my nose
And breathed in the fragrance of a beautiful rose
And smiled as I watched that young boy,
Another weed in his hand,
About to change the life of an unsuspecting old man.
- by C.L. Costello-Forshey
Today, I taught this poem in class.
And realised how appropriate this poem is for me.
There are some lines that stuck me to the core.
Through the eyes of a blind child, at last I could see
The problem was not with the world; the problem was me.
And for all of those times I myself had been blind,
Had I been 'asleep' all this while? Had I been so wrapped up in my own problems that I forget that there are indeed many other things that I should really be thankful for.
I need to listen...and not just hear what is said.
I need to speak, and not just talk.
I need to step back...and not whine or complain.
A rose...by an other name, is still smell as sweet.
Dee...stop and smell the roses.
and dear little special child...thank you for opening my eyes to my blind spots.
One day...you will thaw me out.
Beneath the long, straggly branches of an old willow tree.
Disillusioned by life with good reason to frown,
For the world was intent on dragging me down.
And if that weren't enough to ruin my day,
A young boy out of breath approached me, all tired from play.
He stood right before me with his head tilted down
And said with great excitement, "Look what I found!"
In his hand was a flower, and what a pitiful sight,
With its petals all worn -- not enough rain, or too little light.
Wanting him to take his dead flower and go off to play,
I faked a small smile and then shifted away.
But instead of retreating he sat next to my side
And placed the flower to his nose and declared with overacted surprise,
"It sure smells pretty and it's beautiful, too.
That's why I picked it; here, it's for you."
The weed before me was dying or dead.
Not vibrant of colors, orange, yellow or red.
But I knew I must take it, or he might never leave.
So I reached for the flower, and replied, "Just what I need."
But instead of him placing the flower in my hand,
He held it midair without reason or plan.
It was then that I noticed for the very first time
That weed-toting boy could not see: he was blind.
I heard my voice quiver, tears shone like the sun
As I thanked him for picking the very best one.
"You're welcome," he smiled, and then ran off to play,
Unaware of the impact he'd had on my day.
I sat there and wondered how he managed to see
A self-pitying woman beneath an old willow tree.
How did he know of my self-indulged plight?
Perhaps from his heart, he'd been blessed with true sight.
Through the eyes of a blind child, at last I could see
The problem was not with the world; the problem was me.
And for all of those times I myself had been blind,
I vowed to see the beauty in life, and appreciate every second that's mine.
And then I held that wilted flower up to my nose
And breathed in the fragrance of a beautiful rose
And smiled as I watched that young boy,
Another weed in his hand,
About to change the life of an unsuspecting old man.
- by C.L. Costello-Forshey
Today, I taught this poem in class.
And realised how appropriate this poem is for me.
There are some lines that stuck me to the core.
Through the eyes of a blind child, at last I could see
The problem was not with the world; the problem was me.
And for all of those times I myself had been blind,
Had I been 'asleep' all this while? Had I been so wrapped up in my own problems that I forget that there are indeed many other things that I should really be thankful for.
I need to listen...and not just hear what is said.
I need to speak, and not just talk.
I need to step back...and not whine or complain.
A rose...by an other name, is still smell as sweet.
Dee...stop and smell the roses.
and dear little special child...thank you for opening my eyes to my blind spots.
Another special child
When I learn to sense the vibes or auras that come from troubled soul; my whole being responds.
I am beginning to see who this child is...and I feel the pain.
But I question...am I ready?
With each special child, there is a new challenge to take on.
With the new individual, I know that again, and again...I will be tested.
I will have to encase my heart in steel...and yet, the armour will be easily broken.
I know I should not question.
God works in mysterious ways...
But please God, I am already worried about my own.
Perhaps this is Your way...
Dear special child,
I will take it slow and easy...for I am not ready for you yet.
But if it is meant to be...I will take you as my own...and do what I am supposed to do.
To all my other kids out there,
Someone is hurting very badly...I know.
Do take good care of yourselves.
I miss most of you...one way or another.
I will try...to accept this new one...and bring to the fold.
Monday, February 22, 2010
Sensory Defensive
I wrote in one of my earlier entries that a possible cause of my claustrophobia is that I 'suffer' from an affliction called sensory defensiveness. Because the mind and body work together to operate the 'me' being, when one is out of alignment, everything else goes haywire itself.
We all know that instinctively, we respond to the 'fight, flight or freeze' responses when faced with certain circumstances. Our stress response is designed to help us survive an immediate threat. But I suppose that when one is hyper-sensitive, the body keeps on releasing stress hormones all the time...and with that, the body, mind and soul get worn down very easily.
When I was younger, I was very much a 'gabra' person...easily excited and excitable.
Years of 'training' ...of how one has to behave in public especially has taught me to keep my emotions under control...in public. That is why it sometimes look as though I am calm (haha), collected (hehe) and operate on an ultra-zen mode.(kekekeke). But of course, all that pent-up stress need an outlet somewhere.
So anyway...here I am...nervy, edgy, jumpy.
It makes me mentally tired...and this chronic fatigue is literally exhausting.
So guess what?....time to find comfort food...with lots of chocs and B&Js.
Bad...real bad....
But like I said...I will fight.
Step one....breathe....breathe...breathe....
Write...write...write...(whine, whine, whine)
I feel so random today.
But glad that the mind seems to be working.
Things to do today.
1) clean my table (ok...partially)
2) tell someone...I love them.
So you...I do love and care about you.
That's a good start.
Dear God,
Today has been good.
Thank you.
Ameen
We all know that instinctively, we respond to the 'fight, flight or freeze' responses when faced with certain circumstances. Our stress response is designed to help us survive an immediate threat. But I suppose that when one is hyper-sensitive, the body keeps on releasing stress hormones all the time...and with that, the body, mind and soul get worn down very easily.
When I was younger, I was very much a 'gabra' person...easily excited and excitable.
Years of 'training' ...of how one has to behave in public especially has taught me to keep my emotions under control...in public. That is why it sometimes look as though I am calm (haha), collected (hehe) and operate on an ultra-zen mode.(kekekeke). But of course, all that pent-up stress need an outlet somewhere.
So anyway...here I am...nervy, edgy, jumpy.
It makes me mentally tired...and this chronic fatigue is literally exhausting.
So guess what?....time to find comfort food...with lots of chocs and B&Js.
Bad...real bad....
But like I said...I will fight.
Step one....breathe....breathe...breathe....
Write...write...write...(whine, whine, whine)
I feel so random today.
But glad that the mind seems to be working.
Things to do today.
1) clean my table (ok...partially)
2) tell someone...I love them.
So you...I do love and care about you.
That's a good start.
Dear God,
Today has been good.
Thank you.
Ameen
Sunday, February 21, 2010
The Big Puzzle
Enough of self-pity.
I will claw back up...one step at a time.
Lets begin with something more positive today.
Each December, I make it a point to complete a puzzle. I have been doing so for many years.
You see, when I was younger, I was rather hot-tempered and impulsive (haha...still am)
I needed something to keep me focus and build patience.
It forced me to sit still and concentrate.
So I started putting together jigsaw puzzles, 500...right up to 1000 pieces.
Last year, I started on 2...
I got a bit more ambitious, and decided on a 2000 piece.
Unfortunately, unlike most of the puzzles that I have done, this time round, I got two things working against me.
Firstly, I am getting older, and thus...I really need good strong sunlight to make out the distinctions between the subtle colour changes.
Secondly, this is one puzzle that I am not able to start from the corners. You see, they all come in one standard colour - brown.
But as I sat through the past weeks, bent over in concentration, I realise that the concentration, while frustrating at times, has been helpful.
You literally have to keep the big picture in mind...before you can figure out where the small pieces fit.
Secondly, you really need not sweat over the little things...somehow, once you have made the connection, things will fall into place.
I know that there is a bigger picture that I need to see in all that has been happening to me.
Thank you, God, for making me realise what I have been missing, and what I need to do.
I feel better...still challenged...but calmer.
In you I trust.
Ameen.
I will claw back up...one step at a time.
Lets begin with something more positive today.
Each December, I make it a point to complete a puzzle. I have been doing so for many years.
You see, when I was younger, I was rather hot-tempered and impulsive (haha...still am)
I needed something to keep me focus and build patience.
It forced me to sit still and concentrate.
So I started putting together jigsaw puzzles, 500...right up to 1000 pieces.
Last year, I started on 2...
I got a bit more ambitious, and decided on a 2000 piece.
Unfortunately, unlike most of the puzzles that I have done, this time round, I got two things working against me.
Firstly, I am getting older, and thus...I really need good strong sunlight to make out the distinctions between the subtle colour changes.
Secondly, this is one puzzle that I am not able to start from the corners. You see, they all come in one standard colour - brown.
But as I sat through the past weeks, bent over in concentration, I realise that the concentration, while frustrating at times, has been helpful.
You literally have to keep the big picture in mind...before you can figure out where the small pieces fit.
Secondly, you really need not sweat over the little things...somehow, once you have made the connection, things will fall into place.
I know that there is a bigger picture that I need to see in all that has been happening to me.
Thank you, God, for making me realise what I have been missing, and what I need to do.
I feel better...still challenged...but calmer.
In you I trust.
Ameen.
Saturday, February 20, 2010
Thresholds...
I am already beginning to see how 2010 is unfolding itself to be a challenging year.
But I take it as a reminder...of my own limitations, of what I think I can achieve, and of course, of His Greatness and Will.
The Power of Prayers
those are the things that help me through each day.
That He will not forsake me...and He will keep on testing me as he sees necessary.
I will not say that my life has turned upside down. It's that many changes have taken place.
And with each test, I cross into another threshold which I never thought possible.
Today I want to talk about pain.
I thought my carpal tunnel problem was under control. All that I managed to put aside for I really needed to be strong for my girl. She is far more important. Her recovery is crucial.
But that evening, when the pain struck, it was so excruciating.
There is no description, like millions of redhot pins pricking my nerve endings relentlessly. Now I understand why they shot horses that break their legs...it's really more humane to be killed than to suffer.
I could not sleep the whole night, and had half a mind to chop off the limbs instead.
I don't know
Medication works now...but I realise...if I go...
what will become of my family?
God....
Help.
Ameen
But I take it as a reminder...of my own limitations, of what I think I can achieve, and of course, of His Greatness and Will.
The Power of Prayers
those are the things that help me through each day.
That He will not forsake me...and He will keep on testing me as he sees necessary.
I will not say that my life has turned upside down. It's that many changes have taken place.
And with each test, I cross into another threshold which I never thought possible.
Today I want to talk about pain.
I thought my carpal tunnel problem was under control. All that I managed to put aside for I really needed to be strong for my girl. She is far more important. Her recovery is crucial.
But that evening, when the pain struck, it was so excruciating.
There is no description, like millions of redhot pins pricking my nerve endings relentlessly. Now I understand why they shot horses that break their legs...it's really more humane to be killed than to suffer.
I could not sleep the whole night, and had half a mind to chop off the limbs instead.
I don't know
Medication works now...but I realise...if I go...
what will become of my family?
God....
Help.
Ameen
Sunday, February 14, 2010
I am...ready.
These past two months have seen many changes taking place.
One of the things I had to do was to re-examine my own goals, and purposes.
It has been one where I had to take stock and think of future directions.
We are all constantly tested in many ways...and I understand mine.
In the past, the challenges were different.
I have been told many, many times that You test us to remind us of Your Greatness and Your Will.
I submit to Your Grace.
I pray...like I have never done before..
for I find this test...the hardest.
Be merciful, dear Lord.
And if there is any way...in any time...
Take me instead...
Ameen.
One of the things I had to do was to re-examine my own goals, and purposes.
It has been one where I had to take stock and think of future directions.
We are all constantly tested in many ways...and I understand mine.
In the past, the challenges were different.
I have been told many, many times that You test us to remind us of Your Greatness and Your Will.
I submit to Your Grace.
I pray...like I have never done before..
for I find this test...the hardest.
Be merciful, dear Lord.
And if there is any way...in any time...
Take me instead...
Ameen.
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
If things happen for a reason, I will need to find out why.
It is a challenging time personally...
and while I try not to whine or complain, I think I do need to find an outlet.
And it should not be food...I think I have stuffed myself too much with chocs and other junk.
That is not good.
Today was another shocker.
I came down from class,and checked my messages.
There were some from home with the lines "Call me back urgently"
I don't know how to describe the feeling as I trembled to punch the numbers to dial the person on the other line. Yes, I think I steeled myself to receive the news.
Bad news: My 75-year old dad fell...into the drain
Thankful news: He only needed several stitches.
At that age, it is not good to fall. So far, my dad is the latest...after mum, dad-in-law, and mum-in-law.
Between them, a broken wrist, a bad concussion and clotting, and a fractured hip.
Dad has been talking a lot lately about life...and death lately.
I know he has told me "to be prepared for the realities of life...and move on". I know what he means, but I thank God that he is still alright today.
I believe in God's Will, and that in life, there is Qadha and Qadhar.
But I realise that the things that happen lately...have been the greatest challenges for me.
My girl's illness too...is taking its toll. It has truly been challenging to stay strong...especially when my own fears overwhelm me. But I need to stay calm, need to be the one who listens and get her out of her situation.
Psychosis...that's the name.
Sometimes, it seems as if my little girl is lost somewhere, and I must find her...to bring her home.
Ya Rab
I am praying for your constant guidance.
Do not forsake me.
Show me the way.
Ameen
and while I try not to whine or complain, I think I do need to find an outlet.
And it should not be food...I think I have stuffed myself too much with chocs and other junk.
That is not good.
Today was another shocker.
I came down from class,and checked my messages.
There were some from home with the lines "Call me back urgently"
I don't know how to describe the feeling as I trembled to punch the numbers to dial the person on the other line. Yes, I think I steeled myself to receive the news.
Bad news: My 75-year old dad fell...into the drain
Thankful news: He only needed several stitches.
At that age, it is not good to fall. So far, my dad is the latest...after mum, dad-in-law, and mum-in-law.
Between them, a broken wrist, a bad concussion and clotting, and a fractured hip.
Dad has been talking a lot lately about life...and death lately.
I know he has told me "to be prepared for the realities of life...and move on". I know what he means, but I thank God that he is still alright today.
I believe in God's Will, and that in life, there is Qadha and Qadhar.
But I realise that the things that happen lately...have been the greatest challenges for me.
My girl's illness too...is taking its toll. It has truly been challenging to stay strong...especially when my own fears overwhelm me. But I need to stay calm, need to be the one who listens and get her out of her situation.
Psychosis...that's the name.
Sometimes, it seems as if my little girl is lost somewhere, and I must find her...to bring her home.
Ya Rab
I am praying for your constant guidance.
Do not forsake me.
Show me the way.
Ameen
Monday, February 8, 2010
I Dance in my Dreams
and I see the big open space beckoning.
The lilting melodies call and wave to invite me in.
I fall under the soothing spell of timeless tunes
"Let you heart sing...Let us in."
I close my eyes...
and let the tempo engulf me still
Sliding, gliding, turning
Spining, twirling, whirling
till the senses and the mind are one.
I close my eyes...
I feel the spirit lulled as the feet moved
in tandom with the soft quiet sounds.
I dance in my dreams...
For there...I am free.
- Starlightmoondancer -
who longs to dream again.
Saturday, February 6, 2010
Catch Me
Last evening, it happened again.
She came crying hysterically into the room, eyes glazed over.
"Help me!" she had screamed.
Startled, I took her into my arms...
I recognised wild fear.
"I need the key...I want to get out!" she cried over and over again.
I muttered a few prayers as I soothed her.
She was safe. No one would take her away.
I promised her that I would not let her go.
And throughout the night, I watched her sleep...
praying that the tigers that prey her mind would leave her in peace.
Dear God,
I'm scared...and to you I turn.
Help me to be strong...for her.
But should I falter,
Please catch me too.
Ameen
She came crying hysterically into the room, eyes glazed over.
"Help me!" she had screamed.
Startled, I took her into my arms...
I recognised wild fear.
"I need the key...I want to get out!" she cried over and over again.
I muttered a few prayers as I soothed her.
She was safe. No one would take her away.
I promised her that I would not let her go.
And throughout the night, I watched her sleep...
praying that the tigers that prey her mind would leave her in peace.
Dear God,
I'm scared...and to you I turn.
Help me to be strong...for her.
But should I falter,
Please catch me too.
Ameen
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Tomorrow is so full of possibilities
This morning, I have a little time to myself...to muse over the wise words of one of Singapore's founding fathers - the late Mr S. Rajaratnam. An astute man, he crafted the national pledge ( Sadly, some of the students' perfunctory recitation undermines its significance). A book (The Singapore Lion) was recently written about him recently, and at the launch, the writer, MP Irene Ng (a former journalist), paid a tribute by quoting him
"The only thing you can be certain about in this otherwise uncertain world is that the past is unchangeable. The present will disappear in a moment."
How true.
No matter how much I lament about my past, I simply cannot undo it.
That has been cast in stone.
There is little point in wallowing about mistakes, or re-living old victories.
And when things are so fluid and dynamic today, I know I must be forward looking instead of clinging on to the past.
And ...live in the present to the best of my ability.
I look at my blessings today to give me hope and inner courage.
If my current situation is the result of the bad choices I made in the past...I must learn to first forgive myself too.
Self-acceptance is crucial. Awareness of my mistakes must then be followed by the determination to rectify those mistakes.
Today is not the time to procrastinate for tomorrow.
Today is not the time to live in the shadows of the past.
Today IS the tomorrow of yesterday, and the start of your tomorrow.
“What we are today comes from our thoughts of yesterday, and our present thoughts build our life of tomorrow: Our life is the creation of our mind.” - Buddha
I guess I need this reminder more than anyone else.
Fear, guilt, regrets, and missed opportunities will definitely fog my head once , but only I can find my way out.
And that...I must ...NOW.
"The only thing you can be certain about in this otherwise uncertain world is that the past is unchangeable. The present will disappear in a moment."
How true.
No matter how much I lament about my past, I simply cannot undo it.
That has been cast in stone.
There is little point in wallowing about mistakes, or re-living old victories.
And when things are so fluid and dynamic today, I know I must be forward looking instead of clinging on to the past.
And ...live in the present to the best of my ability.
I look at my blessings today to give me hope and inner courage.
If my current situation is the result of the bad choices I made in the past...I must learn to first forgive myself too.
Self-acceptance is crucial. Awareness of my mistakes must then be followed by the determination to rectify those mistakes.
Today is not the time to procrastinate for tomorrow.
Today is not the time to live in the shadows of the past.
Today IS the tomorrow of yesterday, and the start of your tomorrow.
“What we are today comes from our thoughts of yesterday, and our present thoughts build our life of tomorrow: Our life is the creation of our mind.” - Buddha
I guess I need this reminder more than anyone else.
Fear, guilt, regrets, and missed opportunities will definitely fog my head once , but only I can find my way out.
And that...I must ...NOW.
I am a Rock
Today I taught my lit class how to approach an unseen poem. And like the last time, I used a song; though it is something way before their time. (at least when lyrics were more meaningful) It took them a while to dissect and analyse the words, because practical criticism is something you need to really respond to, with your senses, and a discerning mind. Yes, mastering literature is an art by itself.
What did I use this time?
It is an old Paul Simon and Art Grafunkel (yes...the people who crooned Scarborough Fair so dreamily) song. But just look at the lyrics...and lets see if you and I are on the same page on this. (and yes..it reminds me so much of someone I know)
I am a Rock - Paul Simon
A winter's day
In a deep and dark December;
I am alone,
Gazing from my window to the streets below
On a freshly fallen silent shroud of snow.
I am a rock,
I am an island.
I've built walls,
A fortress deep and mighty,
That none may penetrate.
I have no need of friendship; friendship causes pain.
It's laughter and it's loving I disdain.
I am a rock,
I am an island.
Don't talk of love,
But I've heard the words before;
It's sleeping in my memory.
I won't disturb the slumber of feelings that have died.
If I never loved I never would have cried.
I am a rock,
I am an island.
I have my books
And my poetry to protect me;
I am shielded in my armor,
Hiding in my room, safe within my womb.
I touch no one and no one touches me.
I am a rock,
I am an island.
And a rock feels no pain;
And an island never cries.
Who is the persona kidding?
This is the voice, who is trying so hard to convince himself that he is independent and stoic.
But what is he really comes across as a lost hurt soul...who is in need to the very things that he claims to be rejecting.
I hope you will learn a lesson from this.
Dear God,
Slowly...I climb.
Ameen
What did I use this time?
It is an old Paul Simon and Art Grafunkel (yes...the people who crooned Scarborough Fair so dreamily) song. But just look at the lyrics...and lets see if you and I are on the same page on this. (and yes..it reminds me so much of someone I know)
I am a Rock - Paul Simon
A winter's day
In a deep and dark December;
I am alone,
Gazing from my window to the streets below
On a freshly fallen silent shroud of snow.
I am a rock,
I am an island.
I've built walls,
A fortress deep and mighty,
That none may penetrate.
I have no need of friendship; friendship causes pain.
It's laughter and it's loving I disdain.
I am a rock,
I am an island.
Don't talk of love,
But I've heard the words before;
It's sleeping in my memory.
I won't disturb the slumber of feelings that have died.
If I never loved I never would have cried.
I am a rock,
I am an island.
I have my books
And my poetry to protect me;
I am shielded in my armor,
Hiding in my room, safe within my womb.
I touch no one and no one touches me.
I am a rock,
I am an island.
And a rock feels no pain;
And an island never cries.
Who is the persona kidding?
This is the voice, who is trying so hard to convince himself that he is independent and stoic.
But what is he really comes across as a lost hurt soul...who is in need to the very things that he claims to be rejecting.
I hope you will learn a lesson from this.
Dear God,
Slowly...I climb.
Ameen
Monday, February 1, 2010
Lessons from Epicurus
To help me deal with the current state of mind, I am forcing myself to step back and reflect.
I may not be able to slow down and sit still, but the rationale would be if I feed the mind, it helps put a lot of things into perspective. Perhaps this will offer the way out from the trap that I had unwittingly set for myself.
I think one of the most over-rated words today is 'multi-tasking'.
It has pushed many of us into doing so many things at one time; always rushing to push us into doing things hastily rather than carefully. Because we seem to race through life daily, no wonder we get physically, emotionally and spiritually depleted. At night, our attention is distracted by things like TV, the internet and what-nots, that no wonder we deprive ourselves of sleep - a balm to soothe our being.
In my race, I have stumbled, tripped, fallen and limped around.
Now I am lost...basically misguided by a broken internal compass known as my 'ego'.
Internally, I have gone MIA....and I think subconsciously, I do not want to be found...yet.
What does this have to do with Epicurus?
He was a Greek philosopher who advocated one thing...that life, is simple.
"Pleasure is the end...freedom from pain in the body, and trouble in the mind." -Epicurus "Letter to Menoeceus"
Simplicity is the key to obtaining pleasure and minimizing pain.
I suppose that is the end goal that I seek right now.
A healthy body, a clear and untroubled mind, a fulfilled soul...all ready for my Creator.
Phew...that's it for now.
Even thinking seems difficult
Come Dee...declutter...declutter...declutter...
Begin with the mind.
KISS - Keep it short and simple.
Dear God,
In you, I trust.
Ameen
I may not be able to slow down and sit still, but the rationale would be if I feed the mind, it helps put a lot of things into perspective. Perhaps this will offer the way out from the trap that I had unwittingly set for myself.
I think one of the most over-rated words today is 'multi-tasking'.
It has pushed many of us into doing so many things at one time; always rushing to push us into doing things hastily rather than carefully. Because we seem to race through life daily, no wonder we get physically, emotionally and spiritually depleted. At night, our attention is distracted by things like TV, the internet and what-nots, that no wonder we deprive ourselves of sleep - a balm to soothe our being.
In my race, I have stumbled, tripped, fallen and limped around.
Now I am lost...basically misguided by a broken internal compass known as my 'ego'.
Internally, I have gone MIA....and I think subconsciously, I do not want to be found...yet.
What does this have to do with Epicurus?
He was a Greek philosopher who advocated one thing...that life, is simple.
"Pleasure is the end...freedom from pain in the body, and trouble in the mind." -Epicurus "Letter to Menoeceus"
Simplicity is the key to obtaining pleasure and minimizing pain.
I suppose that is the end goal that I seek right now.
A healthy body, a clear and untroubled mind, a fulfilled soul...all ready for my Creator.
Phew...that's it for now.
Even thinking seems difficult
Come Dee...declutter...declutter...declutter...
Begin with the mind.
KISS - Keep it short and simple.
Dear God,
In you, I trust.
Ameen
Lessons from Macbeth
Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage
And then is heard no more. It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing."
William Shakespeare
- Macbeth, 1606
The noise gets to me...and I need to retreat. How I wish I was in a hermetically sealed environment sometimes...so detached and devoid...and mercifully, numbed from pain.
This is not good...being so out of sync like this.
The internal dialogue must change..I am aware of that...
But when...?
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